Purity

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Postby Nate » Tue Mar 01, 2011 8:38 pm

I don't think Testamints fall into the same category as purity rings at all.

You can eat the mints. They make your breath fresh.

The ring doesn't do anything. So this automatically makes Testamints kind of awesome and purity rings still suck.
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Postby K. Ayato » Tue Mar 01, 2011 8:38 pm

And then, once you get married, what are you supposed to do with the ring? Anyone ever considered that? I still have my True Love Waits ring, but when I look at it, I think it's a pretty boring piece of metal.
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Postby Nate » Tue Mar 01, 2011 8:51 pm

Didn't someone on the previous page mention people using their purity rings as their wedding rings? That might be kind of useful I guess.
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Postby Htom Sirveaux » Tue Mar 01, 2011 8:53 pm

Nate wrote:I don't think Testamints fall into the same category as purity rings at all.

You can eat the mints. They make your breath fresh.

The ring doesn't do anything. So this automatically makes Testamints kind of awesome and purity rings still suck.


The mints do serve some purpose, yes. Maybe if I get pulled over for driving recklessly on my way to church, I can pop one in to try and mask the smell of alcohol on my breath. Then I can bless the cop with a mint wrapped in Scripture, give a cheery "God bless you," be on my merry way and I'm one deed closer to the pearly gates.

They're still a cheesy way to sell Jesus in the popular market, though.

Wait, there's people recycling purity rings as wedding rings? That's about the most unromantic thing you could do, apart from sprinkle the wedding night bed with confetti and party favors.
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Postby Nate » Tue Mar 01, 2011 9:05 pm

Wait, confetti and party favors on the bed is unromantic? I guess I have a lot to learn about women!
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Postby Hansha » Tue Mar 01, 2011 9:06 pm

Htom Sirveaux (post: 1462823) wrote:That's about the most unromantic thing you could do, apart from sprinkle the wedding night bed with confetti and party favors.


I would never stop laughing if that happened. xD
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Postby Lynna » Tue Mar 01, 2011 9:18 pm

I meant to post in this thread a long time ago, but I am very busy XD
anyways, I agree most of the things aliveinhim said, except, really, for the kissing thing. I figure once you're engaged, a little kissing can't hurt, as long as you know your boundries. Oh...and I'm not really sure about the whole courting thing. I don't really like courting or dating much, because it goes with the expectations that you will get married, instead of just getting to know eachother, as friends first. I don't know...
I think purity balls sound creepy.
I've always thought of purity rings as beeing cute. However, I don't know for certain if I'll ever get married. I want to, but what if it isn't God's plan for me? And Also, what if a girl already made a mistake and lost her virginity, then, wouldn't making virginity all imprtant be kind of...putting her down? Saying she's not as good just because she isn't a virgin? I don't know...
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Postby Seto_Sora » Tue Mar 01, 2011 9:43 pm

Lynna (post: 1462827) wrote:I've always thought of purity rings as beeing cute. However, I don't know for certain if I'll ever get married. I want to, but what if it isn't God's plan for me? And Also, what if a girl already made a mistake and lost her virginity, then, wouldn't making virginity all imprtant be kind of...putting her down? Saying she's not as good just because she isn't a virgin? I don't know...


Hmmm... this is kinda heavy. First off, purity rings and promise rings aren't necessarily the same thing. So you may have a "promise ring" to stay faithful to one's spouse until one gets married. And while this sounds well and good, its unachievable and directed in the wrong way. Making a promise to one's future spouse whom one doesn't even know exists kinda seems idolatrous to me (i.e., the worship of one's spouse). On the other hand, "purity" rings I think are a great expression/reminder of one's purity before Christ. This sexual purity is the purity one has before God Almighty, and may be one's own virginity or else may be one's sexual purity or faithfulness from the point one makes that devotion to Our Lord. So what am I saying? I am saying that if a young lady or young man has lost his virginity, that makes him/her no less valuable when covered by the precious blood of the Lamb. This is in the sight of God as well as should be in the sight of the Church, consider the woman caught in the act of adulatory. So saying, if a woman is in Christ but had lost her virginity (so long as she was not in continual sin) that would not make her any less special to me. Nor would it make any less what I have saved for her. What I have saved is my gift first to God and then to my wife and as all such conduct comes from the work of Christ in me, none of it is truly mine. What means this? I cannot compare myself to one who has not done this or that, for we are all sinners, formerly under the curse of sin and death, but we are now saved saints of God brought to righteousness through His work on the Cross; we all holy, white, and pure as though we had never sinned. This is freedom in Christ Jesus.
Oh, and Lynna, you're young. You don't have to worry about marriage for a long time yet. Indeed, keep on as you are going, serving the Lord not worrying about the future and a spouse, that will come in time, and if it doesn't, serving Christ is greatest fulfillment this life has to offer.
...A purity ball!? What is that!? O.o

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Postby Nate » Tue Mar 01, 2011 10:24 pm

PatrickEklektos wrote:"purity" rings I think are a great expression/reminder of one's purity before Christ

No, I think purity rings run into the same problem. They make an idol out of purity.

That may sound weird because purity is a great thing, right? But what's the purpose of a purity ring? To look at and remind you to be pure? Okay, but why can't you just think of Jesus and do the same? You're turning the purity ring into an idol. A thing of power. The ring has no power to keep you pure. It's a piece of metal, it is nothing. You can argue, perhaps, that the ring is a symbol to others of your vow of purity. However, I still argue that it idolizes purity.

Why, you ask? Well, has anyone worn a ring to symbolize their vow to not steal other people's stuff? Has anyone worn a ring to symbolize their vow to not murder others? How about a "truth ring" to symbolize your vow to not lie and always tell the truth? Why don't rings exist for those things? Because those things aren't idolized. Purity is idolized, however, for whatever reason...I'm not sure why. Probably an offshoot of the "anything sexual is evil" thinking.
...A purity ball!? What is that!? O.o

Ugh. I'll quote Wikipedia a bit:

A purity ball (also known as a father-daughter purity ball or purity wedding) is a formal ball dance event attended by fathers and their daughters. Typically, daughters who attend make a virginity pledge; a pledge to remain sexually abstinent until marriage. Fathers who attend pledge to protect what they view as their young daughters' "purity of mind, body, and soul." Randy Wilson, a clergyman involved in the creation of purity balls, advises fathers to praise their daughters' physical attractiveness in effusive but polite terms: "I applaud your courage to look your daughter in the eye and tell her how beautiful she is."

And when they say "purity wedding" they're not exaggerating. At some purity balls, the father and daughter will exchange purity rings and vows. There is also dancing, and events where the father is encouraged to start talking about how beautiful and attractive his daughter is. There is of course also the concern of putting a high emphasis on purity and whatnot when the girl isn't even really old enough to know about sex yet...I mean there's like 8 year olds attending these things.

It's really, REALLY creepy.
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Postby Seto_Sora » Tue Mar 01, 2011 11:57 pm

Nate (post: 1462841) wrote:No, I think purity rings run into the same problem...


You have a valid point. :/ I would have pointed out the symbolism... eh, but you have a pretty solid case there. I don't think that it is always the case of idolizing purity necessarily in that sometimes I see people wear them as more of a show or show-off. And I'll have to be honest that this meybe the case for my part sometimes. Either way, its wrong and seems the same path...
I was just thinking, and I have to share, I was thinking about how the purity ring would be directly related to wedding rings and marriage vows but it occurred to me that those are a representation of both a vow to the Lord as well as a vow and a show of commitment to one's spouse. Do you follow me? What I am saying is that a "purity ring" is not necessary before marriage because it can't express the same thing as a wedding band. Meybe I'm the only one that seemed profound to. LOL But I think you have a rock solid point Nate.

Nate (post: 1462841) wrote:And when they say "purity wedding" they're not exaggerating... It's really, REALLY creepy.


No way! Oh man and that sounds like something they would do too! >( Now thats taking it waaaay too far. Yes, a dad is supposed to be showing enough interest in his daughter to care for her and raise her just like he should with his sons and it is his duty to protect her womanhood while she is under his guardianship. But this really does not constitute protecting her. This is... just ridiculous. Agh! It frustrates me because I know the sorts of people who do this sorta thing... or I should say I used to know.

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Postby Yuki-Anne » Wed Mar 02, 2011 12:13 am

I don't know what kind of Purity Ball you guys heard about, but my dad and I attended 3, and... nothing creepy happened. It was a fun time for me as a teenager to hang out with my dad. My dad can't dance at all, but we had fun joking around. I'm not sure how me signing a pledge to remain a virgin, and my dad promising to support me in that, is creepy. I'm not sure how a father telling his daughter she is beautiful is creepy, either. It's not like he's saying, "You are one hott and sexy thang, and if I wasn't your dad..." That would be beyond creepy.

I think fathers are very important, and having a good father who is willing to give his daughter affirmation ("You are beautiful") in a positive and non-sexual way helps girls to view male attention in a positive and non-sexual way. I have had guy friends with whom there is no attraction on either side say, "You are beautiful," to me. We have an understanding that our relationship is purely platonic. It's not creepy in that situation, and it's certainly not creepy for a father to tell his daughter she is a beautiful young woman.

As for the rings themselves, I don't understand how physical reminder = idolatry. I can use something to remind me to be pure without worshipping it or making it take the place of Christ. There is Biblical precedent for physical reminders. I take communion as a reminder of what Christ did for me, as commanded in Scripture; doesn't mean I'm worshipping the stuff. My ring was not an idol. I knew it had no power at all. But it represented something important in my life.

Saying purity rings are idols taking the place of Christ's power is about as ridiculous as saying that a wedding ring is trying to take the place of a spouse. Nobody would look at a wedding ring and say, "That's stupid. If he wants to stay committed and loyal, why doesn't he just think about his wife?" The ring has no power to make him stay committed. Nobody's saying it does. But it's what the ring represents that is important. It's not as if he would forget he had a wife the minute the ring was off his finger.

Purity rings are the same concept: you're making a commitment not to have sex. The ring doesn't make you pure. It's just what it represents. If someone wants to have one, I have no problem with that. I lost mine a while back and I don't particularly care anymore whether I have a ring or not, but I don't think it was stupid for me to have one.
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Postby Seto_Sora » Wed Mar 02, 2011 12:26 am

Yuki-Anne (post: 1462851) wrote:Purity rings are the same concept: you're making a commitment not to have sex. The ring doesn't make you pure. It's just what it represents. If someone wants to have one, I have no problem with that. I lost mine a while back and I don't particularly care anymore whether I have a ring or not, but I don't think it was stupid for me to have one.


And I have one too; indeed, I'm still wearing it as I type this. And that is great that you wore such a ring, but here is my uneasiness about it now. A man and woman wear wedding rings to show their commitment to eachother to the outside world. Its the world that sees these rings. So here is my question, for whom are the purity rings? The outside world? To what purpose? Obviously we don't need to show our commitment to a spouse we don't even know yet and who themselves weren't even the ones to have given us the ring. And if we don't ourselves need such a visual reminder, who i it for? It seem to me that this must be for the world to see. Isn't this then just like the Pharisee in Luke 18:9-14?

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Postby Yuki-Anne » Wed Mar 02, 2011 12:38 am

Some would say it was a good witnessing tool. I don't know if that was necessarily the case with mine. For me, the ring wasn't an, "Oh, look at me, I'm PURE" thing so much as it was, "Look at your hand. Remember that? Are you sure you want to be doing what you're about to do?"

I'm honestly surprised at all the hate purity rings are getting in this thread. Like, I know I posted the funny video and all, but whether someone wears a ring or not is entirely up to them. It's a piece of jewelry of emotional significance to the wearer. Nothing more.
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Postby mechana2015 » Wed Mar 02, 2011 1:36 am

I always saw the purity rings as a sort of 'rubbing it in other peoples faces' thing.
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Postby Nate » Wed Mar 02, 2011 2:48 am

Yuki-Anne wrote:I don't know what kind of Purity Ball you guys heard about, but my dad and I attended 3, and... nothing creepy happened.

Well, you must have grown up in a good area, because I've seen videos and pictures and all I could think of was how disturbing the whole thing looked and sounded. Going through a mock wedding ceremony with your underage daughter is pretty awful.
I'm not sure how me signing a pledge to remain a virgin, and my dad promising to support me in that, is creepy.

I'd say it is creepy, because did you sign a pledge to remain free of murder? Free of stealing? Free of false witness? If not, why not? Those are sins too, shouldn't you sign a pledge not to do those things? Why is virginity so important you have to sign a pledge for it, but not these other sins?

How is your dad supposed to support you in that anyway? I mean sure you can say "By making sure the guys I take home are upstanding citizens" and blah blah blah, but unless he goes on the dates with you or watches you every second of the day, how is he going to help?
I'm not sure how a father telling his daughter she is beautiful is creepy, either.

It's not so much the saying it, it's HOW they're saying it and the context they're saying it in.

If we were outside on the street and I were to say to you "You look cold," you wouldn't think anything of it. If I was in your house for whatever reason and slid up next to you and said in a slow smooth way "You look cold," you'd probably be extremely uncomfortable. In both cases I'm saying the same thing, but it'd be how I said it and where I said it that would make it disturbing in the second situation.
As for the rings themselves, I don't understand how physical reminder = idolatry.

I'd agree with that if there were rings for other sins, but nope...there's only rings for this one particular sin. Because purity is an idol, one so important that we must have symbols to remind ourselves of our idol.

Okay, let's think of it this way. When you look at the purity ring, what do you think of? Do you think of Christ? Or do you think of purity? If you say you think of both, which do you think of FIRST? I'd be willing to bet you think about purity first, Christ second. That's idolatry. You're wearing the ring to remind you of purity. Christ only comes in after you think of purity first.
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Yes, but they always say to do it in remembrance of Him. You think of His body when you eat the bread/cracker/wafer. You think of His blood when you drink the juice/wine. When you see the ring, you think of purity. Then, maybe you think about Him, but purity is what you're being reminded of.

On top of that, you do know that there are non-Christians who have purity rings too, right? If a purity ring is supposed to represent Christ in some way, why would non-Christians be wearing them? This is a bit different than say, a non-Christian wearing a cross, because crosses are stylish and cool looking. They're not wearing the purity rings to be stylish or cool, they're wearing them as a reminder of purity.
But it's what the ring represents that is important. It's not as if he would forget he had a wife the minute the ring was off his finger.

I knew someone would bring up the wedding ring thing, and no. Purity rings and wedding rings are not the same. Wedding rings are a show to other people that you are married. They're not to remind you that you're married. You already know that! It's to show everyone ELSE that you're married. When a guy isn't wearing a wedding ring, the wife isn't mad because she thinks he might have forgotten that he's married to her. It's because she's mad that he might have taken it off to flirt with another woman.
Purity rings are the same concept: you're making a commitment not to have sex.

And why is this so important you need a ring to commit to it, but not a ring to commit to not murdering, not stealing, not bearing false witness, not coveting, or obeying your parents? Why is having sex so direly important above all these other sins that you need a reminder for it but not the other ones?

You may say "because murdering someone isn't as easy to do as having sex." Or is it? Didn't Jesus say hating someone is the same as murdering? If the purity ring is there to also keep you from having lustful thoughts (adultery) then shouldn't there be a "love ring" or something to keep you from having hateful thoughts?

I stand behind my accusation. Purity is an idol, and purity rings are as well. The very fact there are no rings associated with other sins is proof enough that purity has become exalted above all other things. Especially considering the funny thing is the Bible only uses the word about seven times, and Jesus Himself never spoke of it. Sure, He spoke of not committing adultery, but nothing about "purity."

Sounds harsh, I know. And believe it or not, I don't care if someone has a purity ring or not. I mean, they sell Pet Rocks when you can go grab a rock off the street or something. If there's a sucker who will willingly part with their money over such a thing, someone might as well collect that money. I just think purity rings are a symptom of the problem, not the problem itself. And that problem is, as I said, that purity is an idol. Purity rings are just a side-effect of that.
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Postby aliveinHim » Wed Mar 02, 2011 4:03 am

I seriously could never imagine daddy and I doing a purity ball. He tells me I'm pretty and all that stuff cuz he's my daddy.

Purity is hard for a ton of people. In one sense, it's not hard for me because I've never had a single guy flirt with me nor hit up on me. I used to think it's because I was ugly and my wretched face was too disgusting for any guy. I've learned how to accept myself for who I was and I know that God didn't make me repulsive. God knows I'm not repulsive. I've learned that beauty comes from the heart and shines on the outward. I've met this one girl naturally doesn't have a pretty face but is gorgeous because she's a sweet girl. Crushes are a struggle. I still count that in the realm of purity. One of my friends and I were talking about dating/purity/etc. She was telling me don't go off and have a whole bunch of different crushes. I had a hard time listening to her because she's 32 and still single (and she really badly wants to be married). I look around at my friends who have boyfriends and I have a hard time not getting jealous. I wish sometimes that I have a special guy who I can spend with the rest of my life (otherwise known as a husband). I know God will provide me with the right guy, I just have to wait (believe me, waiting can be really hard).

I still can't stop laughing at purity weddings. That's a little too far. Instead, I keep a notebook with letters to my future husband. I keep it between me and God. Do I stumble and fall? Absolutely. I don't think you need a "wedding" for purity. What if that girl decides to remain single the rest of her life? Or what if she rebels and goes off and does "stuff?"
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Postby Nate » Wed Mar 02, 2011 4:19 am

aliveinHim wrote:She was telling me don't go off and have a whole bunch of different crushes.

She says that like people actively choose to have crushes. XD I don't sit at my computer going "Hmm I think I'm going to develop a crush on this girl today!" It just kind of happens. That's like the dumbest advice ever.
I know God will provide me with the right guy, I just have to wait

While I admire your optimism, I must caution you on giving yourself too much false hope. How do you "know" God will provide you with the right guy? God may provide you with the wrong guy. He provided me with the wrong girl. I thought God was rewarding me for my patience when I met my first girlfriend. I thought "God has finally blessed me with this woman because I was patient and waited for His timing."

And she dumped me after a couple of months. It was a very painful relationship for me. It took me years to get over it. She was not the right girl for me. I guess you could also say I was the wrong guy for her. We were the wrong people for each other.

But know what? I learned a lot from that relationship. I learned things about myself I never would have known if God hadn't sent me the wrong girl.

Remember Job? Remember how he was a great man and did everything right, and God punished him as a test? God sends us tests. God sends us bad stuff sometimes. It doesn't matter how righteous you are, how devoted you are, how patient you are. God might send you the wrong guy because he wants you to learn something. He wants to help you grow spiritually.

I'm not saying He will. I'm not saying you should want Him to. You should always want God to send you the right guy. I'm just saying don't get arrogant and assume that God HAS to send you the right guy just because you've been good and been patient. Job is the perfect example of that. Job was a man after God's own heart, and lost everything he had. Sure, he got it back later, but he had to lose everything first, right?

All I'm saying is, I'm speaking from personal experience. The person you think is the right person, the answer to your prayers, isn't always. God does things to us, or lets things happen to us, that we can't understand, that may be hurtful or painful or confusing. But there's always a reason.

I just don't want you to speak like you have authority on the subject, y'know? You don't know God will send you the right guy. Anything can happen. I had a friend who probably thought God would send him the right girl. He died in a car crash when he was 17. He never got sent the right girl, because that wasn't God's plan for him.

And you don't know God's plan for you, either.
Or what if she rebels and goes off and does "stuff?"

OH NO! Not...stuff! Stuff is so horrible!

Wait. I do stuff like all the time. Everyone does stuff!
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Postby Yuki-Anne » Wed Mar 02, 2011 5:53 am

I don't agree that purity is an idol. At all. I never thought purity would save me. I never thought it was more important than Christ. I made the commitment to be pure because I love Christ. I wore a purity ring because I wanted to remind myself of the commitment. In fact, I didn't actually wear the ring on my wedding ring finger like most people, because I thought that was a little too much. I wore it on my right hand for my own reasons. If chronic lying was a problem for me, I would have no problem with signing a piece of paper with my father or mother or best friend as a commitment not to lie, and putting on a necklace every day to remind myself not to lie. The purity ring was significant to me because I had problems in the arena of sexual sin. Did I think it would save me from that sin? Of course not; that would be stupid.

I wouldn't know about non-Christians wearing purity rings, whether it was an idol for them or not. I've never met one.

I would say that 1 Cor. 6:18 indicates that there is something different about sexual sin, something that makes it unlike any other sin. I'm not entirely sure why you're so intent on railing against purity. How is deciding not to commit sexual sin such a horrible thing? Again, I completely disagree that it is an idol. It wasn't for me, in any case. If anything, sexuality and sexual temptation has been an idol for me, something I would obsess over. In committing to purity, all I was doing was throwing down those idols and putting Christ back where he belonged.

If we were outside on the street and I were to say to you "You look cold," you wouldn't think anything of it. If I was in your house for whatever reason and slid up next to you and said in a slow smooth way "You look cold," you'd probably be extremely uncomfortable. In both cases I'm saying the same thing, but it'd be how I said it and where I said it that would make it disturbing in the second situation.


That would be creepy because you're saying it with distinctly sexual intentions. Not the same thing at all.
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Postby bkilbour » Wed Mar 02, 2011 7:45 am

Thumbs up for Yuki!
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Postby K. Ayato » Wed Mar 02, 2011 8:18 am

I don't care whether someone wears a purity ring or not. That's their decision and I respect that. I also understand that abstaining from sex is a very important thing to us Believers. However, I also understand (and this has been addressed more than once in this thread) that purity involves and encompasses more than just keeping your virginity until your wedding night.

That being said, if you still want to wear a purity ring, why limit it to just not having sex?
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Postby Okami » Wed Mar 02, 2011 8:19 am

I'm following the same basic thinking as Yuki is. Purity for me is in no way on idol, but is a lifestyle. The lifestyle is one of selfless love that I am working to perfect daily. It's one of being a humbled servant and doing what I can for others instead of focusing on myself. I wear a ring with the scripture of Philippians 4:13 to bear symbol of my celibacy. But it's not just a reminder to "stay strong, stay pure" it also serves as a reminder of my purpose, that I am called to heal the broken, that God has bigger plans for me than I probably know right now.

It's a reminder of my daily refinement as I work towards ridding of my many insecurities and learn how to be comfortable with who I am. It's a reminder that on my own I am weak, I have no strength, but that's not the end point - the point is that Christ gives me His strength so I can go out and be and do all He has asked of me.

I've been so down on myself lately because I've noticed a trend of pride and arrogance on my part and it's made me fall into this pit of negativity. It's hard to be and do as Christ asked when in that pit, and now that I've recognized this, I'm able to bounce back resistance and stand again and carry on. It's a reminder of life that He has given. :)
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Postby Yamamaya » Wed Mar 02, 2011 8:30 am

At first when you were talking about purity balls, I thought you were talking about balls that had the words Purity on them that people would carry around.

Then I realized you were talking about something much creepier, ughhhhhh.

I think it's kind of silly to begin with, but all that crap just makes it even more creepy.
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Postby K. Ayato » Wed Mar 02, 2011 8:33 am

I guess what Nate was trying to address was the fact that the Christian community at large seems to be all about saving yourself until marriage and concentrating only on sexual purity, instead of (as we have been discussing) integrating it into every part of our lives. Like I shared before, I wore a True Love Waits ring before I got married and I had my own reasons for wearing it, as do any others who wear purity rings.

What I don't agree with is this (and I'm probably going way off on a limb here) is that the whole sexual purity thing and rings doesn't portray an accurate description to nonbelievers about who a Christian is. As I said before, I don't care if you want to wear a purity ring or not, but what I do care about is what message are you unknowingly sending to those nonbelievers? To me, it's "I'm a Christian 'cause I don't have sex, nyah nyah!"

I've heard and grieved over stories of Christians (some who I have known personally) who engaged in sex before marriage and other activities that probably are not the best examples of salt and light to the world. I know saving your virginity is one thing that can distinguish us from the world, but it shouldn't be the only thing. Get what I'm saying?
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Postby steenajack » Wed Mar 02, 2011 8:38 am

Nate (post: 1462592) wrote:What if you were a secret agent and you just rescued the President from ninjas and then you had a breathtaking helicopter chase of the perpetrators and they'd kidnapped your girlfriend and you heroically saved her while blowing up their chopper and did a death-defying landing in the middle of Times Square? Are you saying you wouldn't kiss her right then and there with the crowds of people watching? What kind of dashing secret agent are you anyway?


Nate, this cause me to LOL so hard that I was crying! XDDD! Where is the LIKE button!?!? CAA needs a LIKE button!!!

*thinks* You know, I actually probably wouldn't mind being kissed and/or kissing in that situation. Cliche, but come on! Tis' a perfect moment! XDDD!

Hm, as for purity rings/necklaces, I don't mind them so long as you wear them for the right reasons. Wear is as something for yourself a bit, something that has meaning to you. Hey, you don't have to wear one, but who says you can't wear one either?

Sure, there are all kinds of extremes people can go too. Well, I'm speaking from the point of view of someone who actually has a "purity" necklace of sorts. It's not really a symbol of just "purity" for me though. It has a sort of sentimental value, and it brings back some good memories for me. I wear it whenever I feel like I'm in a sort of sentimentally romantic sort of mood. It reminds me to pray about these sort of things, y'know? It's just a personal thing between God and I. I don't wear it all the time, just when I feel lead to. Yes, it does symbolize a promise I made about staying pure until marriage, but it has a meaning to me, a sentimental value. Kinda' like the locket I have with a picture of my parents on their wedding day.

At the same time though, I know that my "purity" necklace, is in fact just a necklace. It has no power over me, and staying pure is a conviction I have between God and I. The necklace is just a little reminder of that promise I made to Him, and to remember to pray for my husband (whoever he may be) and for myself. Maybe it's partly the over sentimental-romantic in me. Personally, I'd say do whatever God convicts you to do, y'know? If He inspires you to wear a ring or necklace to symbolize something, then do so. If He inspires you not to, then don't.

I personally choose to wear one once in awhile because it's special and has meaning to me personally. Cause when I look at that necklace I don't just think "purity", I think about how I've really grown as a person and my relationship with God since the day I made the promise. I think of love in genral, and I think of how God loves us. That's just a personal thing between God and I.

I will say though, people put some interesting points on why they mind/don't mind the idea of purity rings. It gave me some things to think about personally, and my decisions of why I choose to wear a necklace.
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Postby Radical Dreamer » Wed Mar 02, 2011 8:39 am

Yamamaya (post: 1462904) wrote:At first when you were talking about purity balls, I thought you were talking about balls that had the words Purity on them that people would carry around.


Not gonna lie I thought the same exact thing, and I was like "purity balls WHAT EVEN." XDD Then I realized that a ball is also sometimes a social gathering. Clearly I don't attend too many of those. XDD
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Postby steenajack » Wed Mar 02, 2011 8:42 am

K. Ayato (post: 1462905) wrote:I guess what Nate was trying to address was the fact that the Christian community at large seems to be all about saving yourself until marriage and concentrating only on sexual purity, instead of (as we have been discussing) integrating it into every part of our lives. Like I shared before, I wore a True Love Waits ring before I got married and I had my own reasons for wearing it, as do any others who wear purity rings.

What I don't agree with is this (and I'm probably going way off on a limb here) is that the whole sexual purity thing and rings doesn't portray an accurate description to nonbelievers about who a Christian is. As I said before, I don't care if you want to wear a purity ring or not, but what I do care about is what message are you unknowingly sending to those nonbelievers? To me, it's "I'm a Christian 'cause I don't have sex, nyah nyah!"

I've heard and grieved over stories of Christians (some who I have known personally) who engaged in sex before marriage and other activities that probably are not the best examples of salt and light to the world. I know saving your virginity is one thing that can distinguish us from the world, but it shouldn't be the only thing. Get what I'm saying?


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Postby Yamamaya » Wed Mar 02, 2011 8:45 am

Radical Dreamer (post: 1462907) wrote:Not gonna lie I thought the same exact thing, and I was like "purity balls WHAT EVEN." XDD Then I realized that a ball is also sometimes a social gathering. Clearly I don't attend too many of those. XDD


Actual balls have fallen out of use to such a degree that when we heard the word balls, we never think of the actual gathering.

If I was a girl, let's just say I would never want to attend a purity ball. For one, it sounds way to incestuous. Secondly, you're not going to get too many offers for dates when people found out you went to a purity ball with your dad.

As a guy, I might be hesitant, just saying.
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Postby steenajack » Wed Mar 02, 2011 8:55 am

TGJesusfreak (post: 1462596) wrote: ... but as we al know.. i am not awesome v____v


YES YOU ARE! So there!
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Postby Okami » Wed Mar 02, 2011 8:59 am

K. Ayato (post: 1462905) wrote:I guess what Nate was trying to address was the fact that the Christian community at large seems to be all about saving yourself until marriage and concentrating only on sexual purity, instead of (as we have been discussing) integrating it into every part of our lives. Like I shared before, I wore a True Love Waits ring before I got married and I had my own reasons for wearing it, as do any others who wear purity rings.


Right. I wore a ring that said "God is Love" for three or four years before I added a True.Love.Waits ring about two years ago. Granted, I could have turned those both into explanations for my love for Christ, but I saw that as awkward and it's a lot easier to explain the Philippians 4:13 ring than that, because it doesn't only stand for purity, but my life and dedication and service for the Lord, everything that I am. :)

What I don't agree with is this (and I'm probably going way off on a limb here) is that the whole sexual purity thing and rings doesn't portray an accurate description to nonbelievers about who a Christian is. As I said before, I don't care if you want to wear a purity ring or not, but what I do care about is what message are you unknowingly sending to those nonbelievers? To me, it's "I'm a Christian 'cause I don't have sex, nyah nyah!" I've heard and grieved over stories of Christians (some who I have known personally) who engaged in sex before marriage and other activities that probably are not the best examples of salt and light to the world. I know saving your virginity is one thing that can distinguish us from the world, but it shouldn't be the only thing. Get what I'm saying?


Exactly. It should be our love that shows us as a Christian. (We just had this discussion in my NT Epistles class, discussing in 1 Corinthians the problems the church was having with the gift of tongues and other spiritual gift and capitalizing that spiritual gifts are for the edification of others.) Everything we do should be not about us, but about that other person and about God. It's hard, there's no doubt. But we aren't to be above any other person, but thinking of everyone as above us. Sadly, so many people get wrapped up in the individualistic mentality of our day...and it's all too easy to get caught up in it.
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Postby Rusty Claymore » Wed Mar 02, 2011 9:08 am

RD wrote:Not gonna lie I thought the same exact thing, and I was like "purity balls WHAT EVEN." XDD Then I realized that a ball is also sometimes a social gathering. Clearly I don't attend too many of those. XDD

I saw the word and just tried not to think about it. >_<
Personally, Imho I don't see why people need to make such a fuss over something that's supposed to be the standard. But alas...
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