School, Stress, and Sickness

[mysngoeshere56]

Hey all!

Anyway, it's nice to be back with you guys again as of a few days ago... Just thought I'd stop by to request prayer for a few things.

First of all, I've been having some issues with registering for classes... First it was because my scholarship was forever late with letting me know that I got it (and even then, they never really let me know so much as I contacted them and they told me). So, I wound up taking this semester off since I didn't find out until it was too late to register for classes... But now, I found out that my entrance exam math scores are expired. So, I'll have to re-take the math entrance exam before I can register for the next semester. :-/ Math is also my hardest subject.

And also, my depression issues have been up and down. As a result, I've been getting kinda sick... My head hurts on a regular basis, and my stomach gives me issues every now and then. My insomnia is currently sky high, and I think my ears might be infected as well. They've been ringing off and on for awhile now... >_<

Anyway, regardless of what's going on, I'm doing my best to look to the Lord. He's always there, and will always take care of me... Sometimes it's easier for me to say it than it is to believe it, but even when the going gets tough, I plan on pressing on.

Sorry I went on a bit of a long ramble... But, if you're still reading, cookies and kudos for you! Thanks for your time, and even more thanks for your prayers! Hope to see you guys around a bit more often from here on out.

[goldenspines]

Good to see you on the boards again, Sno. ^__^

I'll be praying. I hope things can get sorted out for classes and that your head, ears, stomach, everything feels better soon. :<

[Kunoichi]

Praying for everything MSF. I hope that the depression stabilizers and really uplifting to see you are still holding strong on faith in the Lord

[Atria35]

Praying!

[mysngoeshere56]

Thanks for the prayers everyone. Things are still up and down... had a rough night last night, though. But I'm going to a Christmas party at a really good friend's house tonight... I could use some happy time away from it all, so hopefully this'll make me feel a little more upbeat and at ease.

[mysngoeshere56]

Hey - hope you don't mind the double post, but since I had an update and this thread wasn't very old, I figured it'd be easier to keep it in one thread instead of start another one... If you don't mind. ^^

But anyway, thankfully the ear is pretty much all better now. The ringing is almost totally gone and the few times it's there, it's so quiet I hardly even notice.

My depression's gotten a tad bit worse and I'm starting to feel a bit lethargic. I scheduled an appointment with the best counselor I've ever had a few days ago, and he's thinking that whatever it is would have to be clinical... He's thinking that my brain's probably not producing enough of a certain chemical that makes one feel good (serotonin to be exact), because it naturally lowers after being sad/thinking negatively. Since I had a lot of bad experiences, my level is far lower than it should be... He's telling me that the medicine will help me get it back, and with some further counseling/speaking with him, he'll be able to help me think in ways that'll stimulate my brain to produce more of it naturally, so I won't need to be on the medicine for very long.

My mom's very concerned about me being on it, though... She says she's heard a lot of horror tales that come with medicine like that. :-/ The counselor said that, at this point, it'd be more dangerous for me to stay off it than get on it though... He's a Christian man who's studied the field, knows me relatively well, and I can trust to monitor my progress. So my mom admits that she trusts him... she's just nervous about it all.

But anywho, please pray that whatever decision is made is the right one.

[Atria35]

Praying! I've heard bad stories about being on them, but I also know a lot of good stories (from family members) who had to go on them. Just know that if they aren't working or are making things worse, stop taking them and ask for a different prescription.

[mysngoeshere56]

Thanks for the advice, Atria. I'll be sure to keep that in mind. I've gotten several friends who also have forms of depression who've been on meds (most of which I met by sharing prayer requests or by giving/receiving some peer counseling to/from them). They have both good stories and bad, but I'm planning on doing what my counselor recommends... He's a very smart man, and he cares for me very much.

So, I guess please pray that things will go well... and that I'll remember that no matter what happens, I can learn to be content in any and all situations. Why? Because I can do all things through Him who gives me strength.

[Kunoichi]

Mysng: Praying. medicine can take trial and error to find what works for you and in my own experience it has helped me (in conjunction with counseling, prayer, self work etc). good luck!

[mysngoeshere56]

Thank you so much for your prayers everybody. I called some people who are basically a Christian group of people who can give medical care to people who lack medical insurance due to financial setback. My mom's up to her eyeballs in debt and hardly makes anything, so she can't afford to get me any... So please pray that with them, we'll be able to get me some help...

Oh, and in regards to the ears again, I think they're pretty much completely healed. Now they only ring if something loud sets them off first... And even then, the ringing is typically very slight and fades away in a matter of minutes. Actually, now my hearing's a lot better than it was before. I can hear just about anything now, so I'm guessing it cleared out some extra wax and made the ears a little more sensitive. But anyway, thanks to the Lord that the ringing's just about gone now. I would like to invite all of you to rejoice with me on that note. And please pray that it stays away, too.

I also have a second meeting set up with my counselor. I think it's on Wednesday... I'll have to double check, but I'm pretty sure that's when it is.

And thanks for your advice about medication. It's good to hear it from somebody who's actually had experience taking it before... It's somewhat nerve wracking, but if it's part of what God's going to use to help heal me, then I'm willing... I'm ready to get out of this lethargy and depression that I've been in for a good number of years now.

[mysngoeshere56]

Hey, again - sorry for the double post... Hope you guys don't mind, once again. >_< But! I do have a new update.

I was able to see my counselor today, and discussed several of my symptoms... I told him that my mom and I were kind of hoping to get me diagnosed somehow, and I found out that he's actually a state-licensed medical intern and he's studied things like this. So, apparently a free diagnosis from him would be just as good as paying somebody to do it.

After talking with him for about an hour and a half, he officially diagnosed me with major depressive disorder... So, now I know exactly what's wrong. Now the next step is to find the right steps to recovery.

[goldenspines]

You're still in my prayers, Sno. <3

[Atria35]

Still praying. I hope things look up for you soon!

[Nanao]

will be praying for you!

[mysngoeshere56]

Thanks for your prayers everybody. It's great to know that there's a community as loving and supportive as CAA.

I might go down to a clinic to see about getting myself a prescription today. It all depends on what time(s) I can get in.

[mysngoeshere56]

Hey, sorry for the double post... And sorry I haven't updated in quite some time. But, honestly, there hasn't been much to update on until now. And since it's been just a little under a month since I've posted an update, I figured I'd keep it all on the same thread... For the sake of consistency. ^_^ If you guys are okay with that.

Anyway, we had a hard time getting me a prescription. But, we *finally* got one from a friend of my counselor, who's a nurse practitioner and could write me a prescription. She prescribed a specialized kind of antidepressant, which should help me be able to focus more clearly in addition to everything else it's supposed to do (which is something that'd be good for me). She said this medicine is basically the best there is, and it won't hurt me... I should gradually start feeling better, and if I went off of it, I shouldn't have any feelings of withdraw... I'll know I've gotten off of it based on how I'm feeling, but I shouldn't get any cravings for it or anything like that. She also wants me to see her in two weeks for a follow-up.

So, now all I have to do is pick up the medication. There was another option she *could have* prescribed to me that was very cheap (about $4 a bottle), but she said this would probably be better for me considering my age and the circumstances, even though it might be more expensive.

In addition to that, I'm planning on meeting with my counselor again to discuss just what we'll do while I'm on the medication very soon.

[Atria35]

I'm glad to hear things are moving forward, and I'm praytin this works out for you!

[Kunoichi]

Glad you are getting some results. Still praying. Medication can be very personal to the body so I hope this one works for you first shot. Just don't want you to feel discouraged if they have to adjust or try different meds. Will be praying.