Alot going on and overwhelmed

Postby **Kunoichi** » Fri Jan 07, 2011 5:56 am

1. my best friend has brain cancer again. we were supposed to visit each other and couldn't. she is terminal and because i can't work, and don't have the money, i can't go to see her.

2. another friend of my has fatty liver disease and may have more wrong.

3. my mom is going through medical things and they don't know what's wrong with her yet...mostly gets numbness in her fingers, alot of pain etc. i guess i just worry about about her.

4.i fell yesterday while walking. my legs couldn't remember how to walk and it scares me because i do not want to be in a wheelchair again.

5. my C-PTSD with flashbacks and nightmares have come back with avengence so that leaves me little sleep and little rest during the day relaxation wise

6. aunt told me last week that i deserve the abuse i received (from age 14 to 20 which she somewhat believes) and that she didn't believe i was abused as a child (by my father and a non family member) because i didn't "show outward signs" that i had been abused...i shouldn't care but it hurts.

7. boyfriend is moving next month. i am managing going to be able to see him again but then i may not see him for a while. just saddens me.

and 8. I'm dealing with some hallucinations and extreme moodswings where i will go to a very severe low..to where i'm unsafe..to high where racing thoughts, sometimes rage, and what not happens. I don't have psych meds but am going saturday to urgent care to try and get that fixed

what happened tonight too was problems with defaults on my student loans and that i might not be able to go to college in any time in the near future..or work depending if i go downhill again. and when i tried to talk to mom, she blew me off when i tried to discuss college ideas with her because she was buried in work (at 7 pm) which i can understand but still upset .. and physical pain has been excruciating so just yeah.

Please pray God gives me strength in this and some peace. I'm feeling very overwhelmed. I'm trying to hold on to 1 John 4:4.

Thanks guys for listening and I know its a lot.

God bless and love you

Kuno

Postby **Destroyer2000** » Fri Jan 07, 2011 6:05 am

Wow, that's a lot. You're in my prayers; trust God,and He will see you through.

Postby **TopazRaven** » Fri Jan 07, 2011 7:29 am

You're in my prayers Kuno! I really really hope things will start looking up for you. Continue to have faith in God and never give up!

Postby **Sheenar** » Fri Jan 07, 2011 8:44 am

Said a prayer for you, friend. *hugs*

The Lord is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. --Psalm 46

Postby **ABlipinTime** » Fri Jan 07, 2011 10:13 am

Will be praying for you

God knows what you're going through, and he'll take care of things

Postby **Nanao** » Fri Jan 07, 2011 12:05 pm

will be keeping you in prayer. you have a lot going on. i will pray that God gives you healing and comforts you with his love.

Postby **Atria35** » Fri Jan 07, 2011 4:09 pm

Keeping you in my prayers.

Postby **fermy6** » Sat Jan 08, 2011 2:09 am

Am praying.....hang in there

Postby **Kunoichi** » Sat Jan 08, 2011 6:45 pm

Thank you everyone for prayers. It is much much appreciated. Someone also pmed me and to that person I will pm back when I'm able to think lol

I went to ER/Urgent care today and they refilled my psych med that I was on. I was hoping to start on a different med but they want it monitored by a psych and neurologist due to my seizures. I'm happy with that result and hopeful that it will help me.

As for other things, I am just praying that God will continue to open some doors that need opening. Especially in the financial area.

I'll update a bit as I go. thank you everyone!

Postby **Kunoichi** » Sun Jan 09, 2011 4:42 am

Adding to this a urgent prayer request: friend has walking pneumonia and probably alot worse considering she never really had the walking pneumonia go away and never went back to the docs. this has been about 2 months going on and she said she can barely breathe...so she is finally going to a doc today, stubborn person that she is. please pray she will be alright. I have a feeling they may have to hospitalize her from how she sounds.

Postby **Nanao** » Sun Jan 09, 2011 6:42 am

praying for her, and continuing to pray for you

Postby **Atria35** » Sun Jan 09, 2011 6:55 am

Ouch! I've had walking pneumonia before- not fun! Praying for her and for you!

Postby **MrKrillz0r** » Sun Jan 09, 2011 7:16 am

Prayin'

Postby **Kunoichi** » Tue Jan 11, 2011 5:10 am

Update on friend: Doc says severe bronchitis and she's lucky they didn't have to hospitalize her. SO thank you so much for prayers. She still isn't well and keeps over doing it...so I'm hoping and praying that she gets better -_-

For myself I need some prayer in terms of pain levels. I'm getting severe breakthrough pain today (where my medication doesn't touch the pain). Just happens to be a "bad" pain, illness etc day for me and when those days happen, I tend to lash out a bit in terms of irritability etc. Please just pray that when i'm having these type of days physically, that I'll keep compassion and patience.

On another note, trying to get my medical records from my other 2 specialists for this upcoming teaching hospital appointment. They aren't returning phone calls etc so just need to get that situated. I feel kind of silly asking for prayer on it, but if I don't ask, (whether I get this or not) i won't receive.

Praise Report: Back on the mood stabilizer and seizure medication that I needed. Since I've been on it, the mood swings have eased in severity and have only had one minor hallucination so thank you so much for prayers on that

Postby **Yuki-Anne** » Tue Jan 11, 2011 2:23 pm

You're in my prayers. Hang in there.

Postby **Kunoichi** » Sun Jan 16, 2011 8:28 am

Thank you so much for prayers. I am still getting breakthrough pain levels and the ER told me they still can't do anything due to medication. I am praying that God will give me patience and reminder that his Son also suffered.

Please pray for my friend. She has terminal brain cancer and I am trying to reach her but she suddenly is no longer answering messages and her phone is out. I am praying that she hasn't passed away with no one able to contact me.

Please pray also for my uncle as he is going into surgery due to his ankle that they missed. While its not life threatening, always that risk.

I really appreciate everyone's support. These are difficult times for me and I know for many people.

Postby **Atria35** » Sun Jan 16, 2011 9:20 am

Praying for your friend! Being left in limbo like that can only be devastating.

Also praying for your uncle.

http://myanimelist.net/profile/ShaylaBot · Postby **Makachop^^128** » Sun Jan 16, 2011 3:50 pm

>.< wow....Will be praying I hope things get better

Postby **Yuki-Anne** » Sun Jan 16, 2011 4:36 pm

Still praying.

Postby **Kunoichi** » Mon Jan 17, 2011 7:34 pm

Thank you guys for your prayers. Was bed bound today and back on my cane (hate that thing). Just still working on acceptance of the whole situation. Thank you so much!

Postby **TopazRaven** » Mon Jan 17, 2011 7:53 pm

I'll still be praying for you to Kuno. Hang in there!

Postby **Kunoichi** » Fri Jan 21, 2011 9:04 am

Well found out my boyfriend is moving out of state ahead of what we thought. It was unexpected but expected he was moving. I know this may sound trivial, but he is the only person I trust when it comes to what is going on with me mentally and medically. He has always been there and if they end up admitting me to the hospital for this medical stuff...he won't be able to be there..and if something goes wrong where I am really sick...i don't know just scared I guess. Again this probably sounds trivial and for some maybe it is, but he is my best friend and it hurts. Even though we are going to maintain and keep the relationship.

Add to this my best "girl" friend mom's has cancer. her father said that if she doesn't survive the cancer he is leaving (she is 21 and depends on her parents atm and her brother is 17). This is a very hurtful time for her. Please pray for her and me. I don't know how I can support her through all her suffering.

Postby **TopazRaven** » Fri Jan 21, 2011 9:09 am

I'm so sorry Kuno.

You have so much to go through, you are truly a strong woman. I'll be praying for your situation and your friend's as well. May God watch over you!

Alot going on and overwhelmed

Alot going on and overwhelmed

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