Adulthood

[Etoh*the*Greato]

So, a particular XKCD from a few weeks ago has had me pondering something I've felt for a very long time.

As many of you know, I recently married the girl I've been dating since 2002, and as those who were already married told me I would, I feel no different. Thing is, I felt like a kid to begin with, and I actually still do really.

To quote the comic, "I really feel like I stopped growing when I was 15. You're trusting me with a whole building and I still play with legos!"

Any other old timers feel this way, or is it just me?

[TriezGamer]

I resonated strongly with that particular strip, yes.

[ShiroiHikari]

It ain't just you. My husband and I collect toys, play video games and watch anime all the time, and I'd like to keep it that way.

[EricTheFred]

Dude, I'm 48 years old, and I still occasionally look up at the ceiling from my bed and think, "Wait a minute... this is my house? I bought a house? Me?"

[Warrior4Christ]

I don't even know what you just said because I was thinking about Batman.

[KhakiBlueSocks]

[font="Trebuchet MS"][SIZE="4"][color="RoyalBlue"]You know, there are days when I feel like a little kid--especially when it comes down to my Jeep. Every so often while I'm driving, I get tackleglomped with the idea that "Yes, you own the vehicle you're driving. You paid so-and-so thousands of dollars for the vehicle that you're sitting in right now. YOUR name is on the title and registration." By this time, I'm giggling and thanking GOD for what He's blessed me with because it still blows my mind.

I think it's okay to get like that every once in a while.[/color][/SIZE][/font]

[Htom Sirveaux]

Adulthood = Adullthud

But I can collect action figures (which I never take out of the display packaging, by the way), read comics and watch cartoons in my big boy pants.

. . . I've just not yet met a woman who'll accept my undeniable geekiness. *sigh* It's a lonely life. But my action figures will always love me.

[CrimsonRyu17]

Adulthood = Adullthud

Adult heads-up display?

[ShiroiHikari]

. . . I've just not yet met a woman who'll accept my undeniable geekiness. *sigh* It's a lonely life. But my action figures will always love me.

They are out there! I think they just like to hide their geekiness so "normal" guys will like them, or something dumb like that.

[Fish and Chips]

"Critics who treat adult as a term of approval, instead of as a merely descriptive term, cannot be adult themselves. To be concerned about being grown up, to admire the grown up because it is grown up, to blush at the suspicion of being childish; these things are the marks of childhood and adolescence. And in childhood and adolescence they are, in moderation, healthy symptoms. Young things ought to want to grow. But to carry on into middle life or even into early manhood this concern about being adult is a mark of really arrested development. When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up." - C. S. Lewis

[Dante]

I often feel the opposite. I feel much older then I really am, but often play characters on RPs that are much younger then I am. It's as though part of me is stuck in the past and part of my is stuck in the far future. The former is how I often feel in reality though and I greatly dislike it.

Maybe it would be more accurate to describe the latter as a form of escapism in and of itself. I desire days when life was more carefree and not a world of formalities and work. Where who you were mattered more then what you did because no one was old enough to do anything, if you actually did anything it was amazing.

It's cool if you can feel younger then you are.

[ShiroiHikari]

Thank you Fish.

[Mr. SmartyPants]

Excellent quote by C.S. Lewis.

For me, I love to retain much of my childhood ways, but I earnestly desire to grow. Not grow into "adulthood", but rather in a way which God wishes to refine me. That may constitute "social adulthood" in some ways, but if so, then whatever.

[animechica]

I'm 18, and I'm just learning to drive.
I still don't feel like I should be capable of operating such a large, powerful thing as a car.

As far as my hobbies go, I like what I like.
I wear what I wear.

Some bitter old lady at the town grocery store made a comment on a cat-eared hoodie I was wearing once. She said "Very mature."

I will try and shove the impulses I am STILL getting to punch her in the face aside (It really was an entirely out of the blue comment, I hardly know her), and note that I sewed those ears onto that darn hoodie, and I am darn proud to wear it.

I don't understand why "cute" has to apply to only young children. I really don't.

Oh well. While everyone else around me is freaking out about "acting mature" now that they're in college, I'm feeling younger and cuter all the time. haha

[Dante]

Some bitter old lady at the town grocery store made a comment on a cat-eared hoodie I was wearing once. She said "Very mature."

I will try and shove the impulses I am STILL getting to punch her in the face aside (It really was an entirely out of the blue comment, I hardly know her), and note that I sewed those ears onto that darn hoodie, and I am darn proud to wear it.

Those who do not take the opportunity to punch such old ladies in the face lose them.
*Pascal drop-kicks old hag on the head*

I'd of been tempted to go verbally ballistic on her :

Pascal: Really?! HI! I'm FROM the INTERNET! I don't get out much in the "real world" and heard these make people like me! You want to like me don't you! I thought people on the Internet knew EVERYTHING! You must be really mean if you don't like me! Bad things happen to people who don't like me, like godwins or memes... Oh yes. yes yes... you'd be a good meme. One moment, I need your picture for much photoshopping.

All things aside, that is the most terrifying comment in the world. Nothing strikes another human beings heart with fear then the phrase:
"I am from the INTERNET."
Save perhaps...
"I am from the IRS"

[Amzi Live]

Still feel very much like a kid.
Life is so much better that way. Actually things get all messed up when I try to act way more grown up than I actually am.
I'm done trying.
Of course it doesn't mean to be irresponsible or anything. Wait,I just realized what Jesus meant when speaking of how we needed to be like children.
Woah! Eye opener right there. O.O

By the way,great quote Fish.

[minakichan]

I'm 20 and I think I'm going through a quarter-life crisis. The future seems really bleak to me (in an "it all goes downhill from here" way) and I dread spending the rest of my life doing something boring. I'm starting to realize that my dreams are impossible and I'll never make enough money to satisfy my parents. I'm starting to lose interest in the things I loved (like drawing manga) because they're just so pointless in the grand scheme of things.

The transition between adolescence and adulthood is really how people become hikkikomori, isn't it...

[sharien chan]

I'm 21 and I just got married two months ago. I still feel like a kid. Sometimes it's like nothing really changed between my husband and I. The only difference is we live together. But we still act the same (immature), and feel like we're not adults (he's 27). It's a weird adjustment.

[BubblegumNinja]

You guys are such an inspiration to me. XD Being only eighteen, I can't really jump in and add to this thread, I think, but I really want to treasure childish things for the rest of my life. I never want to stop collecting toys or appreciating cartoons (or laughing at them for that matter)... and I don't ever want to loose my wonder for the world around me...

[Cognitive Gear]

I am definitely just a kid who's body has grown bigger. This is amusingly in stark contrast to how I felt when I was actually a kid, as I always felt more mature, and was told so on a regular basis. This continued until I was about 15, then I never heard it again.

So I have been 15 ever since. It's just that now I have the legal ability to go wherever and do whatever I want.

[Amzi Live]

The future seems really bleak to me (in an "it all goes downhill from here" way) and I dread spending the rest of my life doing something boring. I'm starting to realize that my dreams are impossible and I'll never make enough money to satisfy my parents. I'm starting to lose interest in the things I loved (like drawing manga) because they're just so pointless in the grand scheme of things.

The transition between adolescence and adulthood is really how people become hikkikomori, isn't it...

Woah,so true!!!
I think lots feel the way (me included) when they break from high school. For example I had lots of dreams that completely went down the drain,and now (a year later) I'm taking them back out cause I realize that not all of them were trash or impossible. Even if things turn bad remember those people throughout history who have done other things while continuing to follow their dreams. (Even if it's not a dream job). My fear is to live a mediocre life,but trust me I'm gonna do all I can before that happens. I think that one should take that attitude,and be sure if all of ones dreams are not worth it. Some times one will find new ones,but sometimes one just needs to hold on to them.

[ADXC]

@ Sapphi-I understand your frustration, but you must respect your elders(I know that's not the issue here.). She was just making an elderly comment. That's what elders do. However you could just simply explain that you sewed them on because you like them. Maybe she would have understood, I don't really know though. Some people can be stubborn to ignorance. But still respect her, she's been on this earth a lot longer and (Although the comment was not nice at all.) kinda deserves a little respect.

What I am saying is that if you respect her, she may decide to listen to your reason for wearing them(Because you love to wear what makes you feel comfortable or what you want to wear.). Even though, it may not happen, it still would be a good thing to try. God will notice this act of self-restraint and respect.

[heero yuy 95]

I'm 20 and I think I'm going through a quarter-life crisis. The future seems really bleak to me (in an "it all goes downhill from here" way) and I dread spending the rest of my life doing something boring. I'm starting to realize that my dreams are impossible and I'll never make enough money to satisfy my parents. I'm starting to lose interest in the things I loved (like drawing manga) because they're just so pointless in the grand scheme of things.

I totally feel ya! I'll be 20 in a few months, and after high school it seems like we all just become cogs in a soulless machine. The first year of college was probably one of the bleakest years of my life.

[ADXC]

The first year of college was probably one of the bleakest years of my life.

Gee, so I am about to head into the bleakest year of my life? This makes me sad...

[mechana2015]

Gee, so I am about to head into the bleakest year of my life? This makes me sad...

It isn't for everyone.

[Dante]

Gee, so I am about to head into the bleakest year of my life? This makes me sad...

Nah, I felt that way ever since about 16-17, especially seventeen for some reason. I suppose it depends on the person really, my Mom thought that 20-25 should have been the best years of my life. There is a large complicated history and hard-wiring behind it and frankly to say that I'm the general case is to devalue the complexity of the human experience.

Ultimately I guess 22-23 hasn't been all that bad for me. I've achieved something I wanted for a long time (graduate school) and that gives me some feeling of meaning and self worth. The fact that I don't want to ever leave should tell you that I'm at the very least comfortable here. The fact that at 20-22, without graduate school, I thought my life a total failure and (If legal) would have sold my body organs to the highest bidder on Ebay who would donate the money to charity should tell you even more.

Outside of that however, I refuse to give other people enough of a chance that they can ever value me for who I really am, so I can't say I as a person hold value in and of myself. Being somewhat jaded from my earlier years, I'm also more cold in person then warm or amiable, even if I do have the best of intentions (Internet me is not me IRL if you know what I mean, although perhaps closer to the old me). Everything is about achieving my goals and to heck with anyone, including and especially myself, that gets in the way. I don't know if the all or nothing attitude contributes to this feeling, but it certainly let's me know where the priority of my life sits.

I keep all older friends (>30ish at least) and make it almost impossible for anyone under that age limit to be even slightly close to me. Anyone younger may get a smile and hello, I may care about their well-being, but even if they're slightly older then to me, they're still just "kids". It's not like it was such a loss to either of us that we sought each other out so that is simply how the cookie crumbles.

Ultimately though, even though this only scratches the surface, it is quite clear there is a wide body of behaviors which make up me that cause me to feel the way I do. To say that you'll feel the same way is not necessarily so.

Reading this you'd also think I understood nothing of life, but I still feel I see where the rivers flow and what paths any person "should" take, but choose willingly and purposefully not to. In other words, I would sometimes choose to ignore my own advice in favor of the harder path on more occasions then not because of a different skewed set of personal values. I still learn by taking the road less traveled by and comparing my life to others.

[Warrior4Christ]

Hey brother, do you remember when
We used to play outdoors
Til the light was absorbed by the night?
Hey brother, it was a nicer time
We used to laugh til we cry
We're still boys on the inside
(I want to do it again)

I still have an appreciation of playgrounds...

[BubblegumNinja]

Hey brother, do you remember when
We used to play outdoors
Til the light was absorbed by the night?
Hey brother, it was a nicer time
We used to laugh til we cry
We're still boys on the inside
(I want to do it again)

I still have an appreciation of playgrounds...

Aaaw, I love this song so much... Everytime I listen to it I end up feeling all nostalgic. It's one of my favourite's from Anberlin...

And ditto, btw.

[heero yuy 95]

Gee, so I am about to head into the bleakest year of my life? This makes me sad...

Not necessarily, my brother went to a university for five years and loved it. You may too. I just felt like I was wasting my time.

It isn't for everyone.

Bingo.

[ADXC]

@ Pascal-Well thanks for telling me this stuff. I know they may not be the best years of my life; however I do see these as the years where one truly defines his self and his standards. I know it's going to be hard, but even though they may not be the happiest years of my life, they may just be some of the most important. Thankfully Im going to a Christian University so I may be able to have great years there, hopefully.

@ heero-Thanks for that, I will remain hopeful then.