The Pastor's Kitten

[Paul]

This story was told by our Bishop sunday, during his message. He got it via an email from another member of our church...

This particular story just made me laugh. Every time I think about it, the vision of that poor cat just amuses me to no end. Hope the story leaves a bright spot in your day.

Dwight Nelson recently told a true story about the pastor of his church. He had a kitten that climbed up a tree in his backyard and then was afraid to come down. The pastor coaxed, offered warm milk, etc. The kitty would not come down.

The tree was not sturdy enough to climb, so the pastor decided that if he tied a rope to his car and pulled it until the tree bent down, he could then reach up and get the kitten.

That's what he did, all the while checking his progress in the car. He then figured if he went just a little bit further, the tree would be bent sufficiently for him to reach the kitten. But as he moved the car a little further forward, the rope broke.

The tree went 'boing!' and the kitten instantly sailed through the air - out of sight.

The pastor felt terrible. He walked all over the neighbourhood asking people if they'd seen a little kitten. No. Nobody had seen a stray kitten.

So he prayed, 'Lord, I just commit this kitten to your keeping,' and went on about his business.

A few days later he was at the grocery store, and met one of his church members. He happened to look into her shopping cart and was amazed to see cat food.

This woman was a cat hater and everyone knew it, so he asked her, Why are you buying cat food when you hate cats so much?' She replied, 'You won't believe this,' and then told him how her little girl had been begging her for a cat, but she kept refusing.

Then a few days later, the child had begged again, so the Mom finally told her little girl, 'Well, if God gives you a cat, I'll let you keep it.' She told the pastor, 'I watched my child go out in the yard, get on her knees, and ask God for a cat. And really, Pastor, you won't believe this, but I saw it with my own eyes. A kitten suddenly came flying out of the blue sky, with its paws outspread, and landed right in front of her.'

Lesson learned: Never underestimate the Power of God and His unique sense of humour.

Hope it brighten's everyone's day.

[USSRGirl]

XD That was a good one. Unfortunately, I'm gonna ave to be the skeptic here and say it sounds like tall tale. Any idea if it's based off a true story?

[ADXC]

That's a good story, I like it.

[Kaligraphic]

That's a common joke, actually, especially on the pastor circuit. Flinging kittens is not recommended.

[ADXC]

If it's so common, the why haven't I heard of it?

[Kaligraphic]

I dunno. It's been floating around the net for at least a decade. Maybe you just have a good spam filter. Or no tech-literate church friends.

example from '99

[Paul]

Well, if the story is true or not does require some investigation, but as for being sure funny, I couldn't help but post it to give everyone something to laugh about.

[RandomBurrito]

XD Almost sounds like how I got a cat. My mom dislikes kitties and it took some prayer to God to get one.

[Tsukuyomi]

Either way, it's still a good story and is possible XDD It's a long shot, but you'll never know XDD Anything is possible <33

That would be some coincidence though if something LIKE that did ever really happen XDD

[sharien chan]

Who cares if it's real or not, the point behind it is true. God does have a unique sense of humor XD that and prayer works.

[ADXC]

I dunno. It's been floating around the net for at least a decade. Maybe you just have a good spam filter. Or no tech-literate church friends.

example from '99

You know what, Kali? I can see that you are being very bitter and I don't like it. I really don't have any friends, so that cuts deep.

I liked this story and I have not heard it because I have not heard it. Nothing more. If you think this story is common and stupid, that's your deal.

[Tsukuyomi]

You know what, Kali? I can see that you are being very bitter and I don't like it. I really don't have any friends, so that cuts deep.

I liked this story and I have not heard it because I have not heard it. Nothing more. If you think this story is common and stupid, that's your deal.

I honestly don't think he was being bitter ^^ Just being informative ^__^

Things can be very hard to read on the internet... Even with emotes.This is one example of this ^__^

It's a very good story indeed ^^ Made up or not ^__^

[Kaligraphic]

I never said that it was stupid, just that it was a common pastor joke. It also tends to be passed along church email communities frequently enough that not having heard it suggested that your church friends might not be accustomed to email.

Temmy had asked if anyone knew if it was true, so I figured a short answer would suffice, rather than dig about for a Snopes article or something. The word common was a description of its (lack of) rarity. Most pastors I know have heard it multiple times, and probably the majority have used it in a sermon/homily/message at least once. It's a decent opener to a couple different kinds of sermons.

[Dante]

That story, true or not, is full of win. It is however not entirely different from how I came to own my first pet tarantula.

When I was a young boy, so many years ago, I loved spiders. I mean I LOVED SPIDERS. Most kids slept with teddy bears, I slept with a bed full of plastic eight-legged creatures generally found around Halloween time and even dressed up my favorite squeaking plastic friend and called him squeaky. My mom used to tell me spider stories about Squeeky (at my insisting) and even when she took me to a fake palm reader at a kids party and they said I was going to marry a beautiful girl, I retorted that they were obviously wrong... I was going to marry spider! (Give me a break, I was about 5-6 and had no idea of the biological side of marriage)

So it was of little surprise that I, King of Spider city (I wrote books about the place when I was little and the politics that played out between them and the other insects of the world) wanted a pet tarantula. My Mom, who had put up enough with having to tell her boy about the political climate run by a mischievous and lovable plastic spider was unsurprisingly completely against the idea. I had already stuck rolly polly bugs in her bed when I was younger while she was sleeping and asked her to "watch them". There was no WAY she was going to pay to get me the chance to get a large "bug" as a pet. Thus, in her lack of understanding of the importance of the subject to me, she made a terrible mistake... she told that if I wanted to have a pet tarantula, I would have to ask God to send me one.

That was a very fatefull request I might add, as I prayed quite often for that tarantula, and to say the least, I did get one.

We were taking a hiking trip into the forests near Flagstaff back before mankind wiped out most of the wildlife in existence around here with quads and beer cans and it had been to say the least an exciting trip. I didn't get to hike much as a kid and seeing the forest after years trapped in the four walls of the school and the suburban world of Glendale was a real treasure. Anyways, to avoid getting off into a tangent, as we were coming down the mountain my mother viewed that horror of horrors sitting right in front of our path. A tarantula.

It was just sitting there in the middle of the heavily used trail waiting and knowing I would be there shortly she knew that she'd better try and get it away. Try as she might though she could not shew the tarantula away and there it continued to sit and wait... Of course, it was a wild tarantula, there was no way it we could get it home she thought. Just as expected I came around the corner and my eyes quickly picked out that image of the giant spider and I jumped for joy over and over again, God had sent me my tarantula!

However, much to my mother's delight there would be no way the thing would let us take it home and as soon as we approached it would surely run like crazy. So, expecting it to fully run away the suggestion came up that we should try and catch it in Dad's binocular case... It would of course HAVE to run away once one got closer.

Needless that wasn't the case, my mother tried to shew it off a few more times as she approached but as she put the case down, instead of running away... the spider crawled up into the case itself! To bring the story to a close, there was really nothing that could be done... and I ended up with a pet tarantula!

[AJV]

Aww...What a cute story.
It really gave my mom and I a good laugh.
Thanks for sharing.

[Lady Kenshin]

Aw... that's so cute! *Is somehow reminded of Darren Shan*

[Tsukuyomi]

Lol, tha'ts really cute, Pascal ^^ What did you name him/her ^^?

[Paul]

That was awesome, Pascal!

[RandomBurrito]

Haha, Pascal that's coolness. Again, same with my cat. To make a short story even shorter: saw a kitty, wanted it badly, prayed for kitty, mom hesitated to get kitty, finally said yes to kitty if I can find it, couldn't find kitty but instead found other kitty who was only a few weeks old and beautiful, lady said I can have kitty for free and voila, I had kitty. God gave me my pretty kitty ^_^

[Dante]

...

Mr. Harry (Hairy) Webster . My sister or Mom came up with that name. Not me , but it was really cool and ironic that they would come up with such a thing when it was my tarantula.

[Kurama]

Who cares if it's real or not, the point behind it is true. God does have a unique sense of humor XD that and prayer works.

True dat. XD


I loved it. Made me giggle. ^^