Having to discuss my background in the interview part (and also some of the questions that I had to bubble in a response to) brought back some pretty bad memories of my past. It's like I just can't get away from it --I keep trying to put my past with my mom behind me and it keeps coming back up. I hate being reminded of all the crap I have gone through --I just want to forget sometimes (though I know God can --and He has--use my past to help someone else).
It's just hard to be reminded of it --a lot of it is still very hurtful to me, so it's like opening an old wound.
It all just reminded me that I have no parents around, no home to go to --I graduate from college in 10 months and I'll have to leave my friends and church family here--who have all helped me so much --and I'll have to start over somewhere else. I'll be on my own and have to find a support system again.
Also, it is wedding season. And I'm starting to really long for a husband and a family. I just a family so badly --it's something I've never really had. Pray that I will be content with God's timing. (Though leaving college with an Mrs. degree would be an added benefit.

Pray that I will stop worrying about the future and about things I have no control over. Pray that I will give all that to God and trust that He has a plan and will continue to take care of me. Also pray that my focus and priorities are where they should be --on the Lord.
Thank you.