anonymous (post: 1217666) wrote:Shooraijin once did the medical repairs, but he's not really around anymore huh...
That's because he's too busy doing
real medical repairs and probably make MILLIONS OF DOLLARS doing it.
But I digress, as all this conjecture is detracting from ultra-violence. Let us proceed.
(SETTING: A foggy mountain with many crevasses.)mathgrant:
Time to unleash my hidden foxger abilities! GAAAAOOO!
(MATHGRANT transforms into a... creature)mathgrant:
Grooovy! Time to win this thing!
(MATHGRANT lets out a mighty howl, which is interrupted by an Urahara plushie flying into his [muzzle?] Confused, he searches frantically through the fog for his opponent)HanaRyuuzaki:
Heel, boy!
mathgrant:
There you are! GRAAAAAOOOOO!!!
(MATHGRANT dashes for HANARYUUZAKI. She barely dodges his attack. He moves in for a swipe with his claws and scratches her).HanaRyuuzaki:
Hey, I'm warning you, I'll thwack you with this here newspaper.
(Of course, he doesn't listen. He attacks again, but HANA counters with a swift strike of the newspaper).mathgrant:
AAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh(MATHGRANT falls... and bounces on jagged rocks, until his neck is impaled on a branch... which snaps off. He falls and the impact forces the rest of the branch to pierce the bottom of his jaw and land on the bottom. But an avalanche causes many rocks to pulverize his body. It wasn't the bottom after all--the chunk of rock he fell on splits from the force of the avalanche and he is sent further down the mountain, where a wild sheep kicks him with his hind legs and he falls into a mole hill. The moles panic at the sigh of his mutilated body and dig away from him, and his falling body triggers some conveniently-placed unexploded nitroglycerin. The explosion forces him further down into the earth, where sandworms, molepeople and trolls mess around with him until he (or rather, what's left of him) resurfaces in China where... a bird poops on him).Winner: HanaRyuuzaki