My life story and testimony.
PostPosted: Sun Aug 08, 2004 2:18 am
I was a bit afraid to write this when I frist came here, but now I feel that I should.
I feel that I have been to hell and back one too many times, but God has save me everytime and bought me back to light of good .
My story starts out as just like anyone else. When I was born, I had it rough from the start. I was born with a heart problem and was born in the year 1980, so know one knew that I had a problem untill I born. I was what you called a blue baby, because I wasn't breathing much when I was born. A few days later, I had small surgery on my heart to keep me alive and I got pass that okay. The next phase was to have open heart surgery when I was 15 months old and it was 50/50 change of living or dying. I guess, God had a plan for me, because I was save again and made it. But growing up for me was hard. I had alot of fear and was mad as a child, I knew something happen to me when I was little, but I had alot of pin ups on it and really had a hard time trying to deal with it as I got older. I use to take it all out on my mom and dad when I was little child. They never gave up hope on me and they got help for me. They saw that what happen to me as a baby was why I took angry out on them. I was scared that people were out to hurt me, I fear being alone and I would only let my family get close to me. As I got help and my mom being a deep christian as she was. She had me to go church at a young age of four or five. I have to say, as I got older, I never understand the point of going to church and all. I felt that if he was so great, when did this happen to me? I just went along with what my mom told me to do and went to church anyway. As the years pass, I was some what of a half believer, but I never really took it in. But I'm glad that I believe in him.
I started to get sick alot and miss alot of school. This starting to get go on more and more and it get worst. When I turn 12, I started to have very bad fevers and was getting sick alot. By the frist few months of 6th grade, I started to sleep in class and have a fever of 104. When I got home, I would just sleep and my mom and dad knew something was wrong. I was frist tested to see if I had cancer and it came back that I didn't. By then, I was getting worst by my 13th birthday. My doctor had another test done on me and the wrost news that I got in my life was a week from my 13th birthday.
I found out that I had the AIDS virus and I got the virus from bad blood that I was giving when I had my open heart surgery when I was baby. This was a scary time, because it was when we really heard about the AIDS virus and stuff. I was more in shock, becuase I was like, how could I get it. I never did drugs or have sex. I was wait untill I was married for that and now my dream of even making it college was done at that part.
As I learn more about it, things were not good for me. I only had T-cell count of three and another germ had enter in my body. I got the MAC germ, which is something that people can get if they have aids and their t-cel count falls to 50 or lower. So, I was fighting aids and the germ at the same time, and really in most cases, most don't make it. Becaue of the mac germ, I start to have fever, night sweats, weight loss, and weakness. The fevers were every day and were from a range of 104 to 107. I was in alot of pain from this and the treatmeant that I was giving to fight the germ.
As it got worst, I was close to giving up. At one point, I tried to kill myself, but I couldn't do it. I started to think that God just give up on me, my mother didn't. She prayed for me and was at my bed just about all times. Then I went back to the doctor and had my check up. I was never told this untill years later. My aids doctor had a talk with my mom and dad and told them that I had six months to live at best. My mom told my doctor that they were not going to give up on me, that I was a figher since day one and she said that she believe he make it with the help from God.
A few weeks later, I was having my nightly fever and I just prayed to God to please just let me die and get it over with. I was at the point that I didn't want to go on anymore. Well to this day, and I still believe that I didn't dream this, becuase I know at the time I was have a very bad fever. I saw this person like standing over my bed. I felt that I was going nuts, but I just look at it. I was not afraid of it, because I had this clam over me. All I remember was, I couldn't see a face but he or she was in white. The person or a voice told me. Don't give up, ever give up. You will be okay. And I remember like the person just touch my head and it kept telling me not to give up.
The next day, I didn't know what to make of what happen that night, but I had this feeling that I was going to be okay and that I had to fight it. A few weeks later, the doctor wanted to have a test done and it came back that everything in my body was off. I had to go to the hospital and was giving fluids to get everything back to the right level in my body. Just in that night there was a change in me. I was sitting up and wanting to eat, something that haven't be able to in a long time. That night and day, my doctor had just about everyone on that floor to have a look at me. My doctor told my mom and dad later that you should thank god, because I really thought that your son wasn't going to be coming home after this and that he got this feeling to have test done on me to see if my fluids in my body were off or not. A few months later, the mac germ was gone in my body. And over time, I getting better and better. To a point where its was like the aids virus was sent back into hiv. Which is not the case, but now I hae a t-cell count of 300 to 400 and the virus is in a very low level in my body now.
I feel that I have been to hell and back one too many times, but God has save me everytime and bought me back to light of good .
My story starts out as just like anyone else. When I was born, I had it rough from the start. I was born with a heart problem and was born in the year 1980, so know one knew that I had a problem untill I born. I was what you called a blue baby, because I wasn't breathing much when I was born. A few days later, I had small surgery on my heart to keep me alive and I got pass that okay. The next phase was to have open heart surgery when I was 15 months old and it was 50/50 change of living or dying. I guess, God had a plan for me, because I was save again and made it. But growing up for me was hard. I had alot of fear and was mad as a child, I knew something happen to me when I was little, but I had alot of pin ups on it and really had a hard time trying to deal with it as I got older. I use to take it all out on my mom and dad when I was little child. They never gave up hope on me and they got help for me. They saw that what happen to me as a baby was why I took angry out on them. I was scared that people were out to hurt me, I fear being alone and I would only let my family get close to me. As I got help and my mom being a deep christian as she was. She had me to go church at a young age of four or five. I have to say, as I got older, I never understand the point of going to church and all. I felt that if he was so great, when did this happen to me? I just went along with what my mom told me to do and went to church anyway. As the years pass, I was some what of a half believer, but I never really took it in. But I'm glad that I believe in him.
I started to get sick alot and miss alot of school. This starting to get go on more and more and it get worst. When I turn 12, I started to have very bad fevers and was getting sick alot. By the frist few months of 6th grade, I started to sleep in class and have a fever of 104. When I got home, I would just sleep and my mom and dad knew something was wrong. I was frist tested to see if I had cancer and it came back that I didn't. By then, I was getting worst by my 13th birthday. My doctor had another test done on me and the wrost news that I got in my life was a week from my 13th birthday.
I found out that I had the AIDS virus and I got the virus from bad blood that I was giving when I had my open heart surgery when I was baby. This was a scary time, because it was when we really heard about the AIDS virus and stuff. I was more in shock, becuase I was like, how could I get it. I never did drugs or have sex. I was wait untill I was married for that and now my dream of even making it college was done at that part.
As I learn more about it, things were not good for me. I only had T-cell count of three and another germ had enter in my body. I got the MAC germ, which is something that people can get if they have aids and their t-cel count falls to 50 or lower. So, I was fighting aids and the germ at the same time, and really in most cases, most don't make it. Becaue of the mac germ, I start to have fever, night sweats, weight loss, and weakness. The fevers were every day and were from a range of 104 to 107. I was in alot of pain from this and the treatmeant that I was giving to fight the germ.
As it got worst, I was close to giving up. At one point, I tried to kill myself, but I couldn't do it. I started to think that God just give up on me, my mother didn't. She prayed for me and was at my bed just about all times. Then I went back to the doctor and had my check up. I was never told this untill years later. My aids doctor had a talk with my mom and dad and told them that I had six months to live at best. My mom told my doctor that they were not going to give up on me, that I was a figher since day one and she said that she believe he make it with the help from God.
A few weeks later, I was having my nightly fever and I just prayed to God to please just let me die and get it over with. I was at the point that I didn't want to go on anymore. Well to this day, and I still believe that I didn't dream this, becuase I know at the time I was have a very bad fever. I saw this person like standing over my bed. I felt that I was going nuts, but I just look at it. I was not afraid of it, because I had this clam over me. All I remember was, I couldn't see a face but he or she was in white. The person or a voice told me. Don't give up, ever give up. You will be okay. And I remember like the person just touch my head and it kept telling me not to give up.
The next day, I didn't know what to make of what happen that night, but I had this feeling that I was going to be okay and that I had to fight it. A few weeks later, the doctor wanted to have a test done and it came back that everything in my body was off. I had to go to the hospital and was giving fluids to get everything back to the right level in my body. Just in that night there was a change in me. I was sitting up and wanting to eat, something that haven't be able to in a long time. That night and day, my doctor had just about everyone on that floor to have a look at me. My doctor told my mom and dad later that you should thank god, because I really thought that your son wasn't going to be coming home after this and that he got this feeling to have test done on me to see if my fluids in my body were off or not. A few months later, the mac germ was gone in my body. And over time, I getting better and better. To a point where its was like the aids virus was sent back into hiv. Which is not the case, but now I hae a t-cell count of 300 to 400 and the virus is in a very low level in my body now.
