Breathe the Mist
PostPosted: Wed Feb 04, 2004 9:05 am
I walk along the path cut through the wood. On either side of me great white trees drop gems of copper and canary diamond. A fine mist dances along the bleak autumn's ground. Somewhere in the distance I hear a stream talking. The sky above me is grey and smooth, covered in changing swirling clouds. A sense of serenity fills the air mingled in with the fresh scent of frozen earth and fallen leaves. Yet I am alone. I stop in my tracks to try and comprehend this fact. I breathe the mist and continue walking.
Is it not my fate, and the fate of those like me to be alone? Once again my thoughts leave me dead in my tracks. My own harsh words echo through my head angrily. No, I cannot be condemed to live alone. I feel my legs moving again slowly at first the faster. Despite my attempt at rebuking my distasteful prediction. Tears begin to stream down my face. The world around me becomes a blur of white an grey. I scream into my inner self the words I am not alone. Somehow they manage to push themselves through my lungs to my lips. My screams and pounding footsteps pushing away the mist and leaves in swirling turrents.
Breathless, joyless, I collapse. I sit there sobbing and begging God to send him back to me. If not him, then someone who will care like he did. For a long while I sit drowning in my tears. Slowly I regain my former dignity and grace. I stand taking a moment to wipe my face of my tears. The cold stings my moistened cheeks. I breathe the mist and continue walking.
For my belovéd Will. While he is in Heaven I hope he knows how much his love meant to me.
I'm sorry for your loss.