CAA: Christian Anime Alliance

PostPosted: **Sat Jan 24, 2004 9:25 am**

Fallen tears,
Rising fears,
Will you save her?
Or die again,
Before you begin,
Doubting your own will.
She trusted you,
What will you do?

If you fail?
Reaching out,
Hear her shout,
Time is running short.
Heave a sigh,
Don't let her Die,
Don't be left alone.
Call her name,
Hide your pain,
Lend her your strength.

The time is come,
What will be done,
Can you triumph?
Or flee her strife,
With your life,
Happy to've saved yourself.
Fallen Tears,
Rising Fears,
Will you save her?

PostPosted: **Sat Jan 24, 2004 11:16 am**

It's very good... Is there a story behind it?

PostPosted: **Sat Jan 24, 2004 11:26 pm**

It has the timing of a rock song, IMHO. :sweat:

I like it a lot.

Your spelling has improved greatly, too. Your writing is wonderful as always.

PostPosted: **Sun Jan 25, 2004 9:56 am**

Nice, Murphy, I like it. It has me, like EireWolf, wondering about the backstory.

PostPosted: **Mon Jan 26, 2004 2:41 pm**

Spiritsword wrote:...It has me, like EireWolf, wondering about the backstory.

The backstory is about a boy who promised to be there for a girl, but got to scared to do anything. The girls friend asked him if he was strong enough to save her and he began to cry. He left the girl and she sank deeper into sin leaving behind her friend and her family.

PostPosted: **Mon Jan 26, 2004 3:53 pm**

whee ashlynn-sama! This is so great! but hey, all your stuff is great.

Its a really sad poem, and it stands out very well as so- you are really good at writing gothic style stuff. One thing that might help it out- I think it'd be good if you seperated it into a few paragraphs maybe every 9 lines.. but the focal point of the poem is very strong. Eez beautiful. n_n