Page 1 of 2

The Joke Thread Returns!

PostPosted: Fri Aug 05, 2011 5:17 pm
by rocklobster
When I first arrived on CAA, I started up a joke thread where people could post their favorite jokes. To celebrate the tenth anniversary, I've decided to bring it back. So, here we go! Here's our first joke:
How many Saiyans does it take to change a light bulb?
One, but it takes at least 20 episodes to do it.

PostPosted: Fri Aug 05, 2011 6:47 pm
by Rylynn4869
rocklobster wrote:How many Saiyans does it take to change a light bulb?
One, but it takes at least 20 episodes to do it.


Ahahahaha!!! That probably made me laugh more than it should have! But it's so true!

EDIT: Okay, I got one!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
... to prove to the armadillo that it was possible!

PostPosted: Fri Aug 05, 2011 9:54 pm
by Furen
has lame joke:

string: Are you a cord?
Rope: No... I'm a frayed knot (afraid not)

PostPosted: Sat Aug 06, 2011 12:05 pm
by rocklobster
OK, here's a long one:
A man got a cruise in a contest. The cruise was captained by a man who looked like a pirate--a hook for a hand, a pegleg, even an eyepatch. One day curiosity got the better of him, and he asked the captain about the injuries.
The captain said: "Arr! The pegleg I got from when an alligator bit me leg."
"What about the hook?" the man asked.
"Arr! Got that when a shark bit me hand." said the captain.
"And the eye?"
"Arr! Got that when a bird pooped in it."
"What?" the man asked, confused.
"It was the first day with me hook!" the captain replied.

PostPosted: Sat Aug 06, 2011 12:17 pm
by Furen
Two guys walk into a bar

OUCH

PostPosted: Sat Aug 06, 2011 12:41 pm
by MomentOfInertia
Furen (post: 1495801) wrote:Two guys walk into a bar

[s]OUCH[/s]
*THUNK!*

Fixed, or "you'd think one of them would have seen it", or ...

A priest, a rabbi, and a dog walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this some kind of joke?"

A mushroom walks into a bar. The barkeep says "we don't serve your kind here"
And the mushroom says "what? I'm a fungi!"


more later.

PostPosted: Sat Aug 06, 2011 12:59 pm
by SincerelyAnomymous
I was wondering where the basketball was. But then it hit me.

PostPosted: Sat Aug 06, 2011 1:05 pm
by Diamond Dragon
Ferb (post: 1495814) wrote:I was wondering where the basketball was. But then it hit me.


WIN. XD

PostPosted: Sat Aug 06, 2011 1:11 pm
by SincerelyAnomymous
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.

PostPosted: Sat Aug 06, 2011 1:15 pm
by MomentOfInertia
I had a cloak of invisibility, but now I can't find it.

PostPosted: Sat Aug 06, 2011 2:13 pm
by Agloval
As the necklace said to the hat, you go on ahead -- I'll hang around.

PostPosted: Sat Aug 06, 2011 2:34 pm
by SincerelyAnomymous
I wondered where the boomerang was, but then it came back to me.

PostPosted: Sat Aug 06, 2011 6:25 pm
by Rylynn4869

PostPosted: Sat Aug 06, 2011 6:45 pm
by Furen
Rylynn4869 (post: 1495857) wrote:Best knock-knock joke ever:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bn1-M5Ze0p8


Subbed

I was wondering why the baseball was getting bigger... than it hit me (I know similar to Ferbs)

if you throw a piano down a mineshaft, I'll show you A flat minor (miner)

PostPosted: Tue Aug 09, 2011 7:26 pm
by Hiryu
Your momma's so fat, she jumped up in the air and got stuck.

PostPosted: Thu Aug 11, 2011 7:51 pm
by Diamond Dragon
Gotz a lame joke:

A mom is washing her little boy. He says, "Help! My Mommy's murdering me to death!"

PostPosted: Thu Aug 11, 2011 11:57 pm
by Crossfire
[quote="From article"]Possible transcript of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October, 1995. This radio conversation was released by the Chief of Naval Operations on 10-10-95.

Americans: “]

EDIT: Got the quote box working. Yay.

PostPosted: Fri Aug 12, 2011 12:47 am
by KhakiBlueSocks
[font="Trebuchet MS"][SIZE="4"][color="RoyalBlue"]I ran into Hinata Hyuga the other day. I asked her, "It's really hot out here today, isn't it?" she said "Ano, right?" (I Know, Right?)

What kind of car would Alphonse Elric drive? A Nii-san.

What do Edward Elric and a bowl of New Orleans Gumbo have in common? Shrimp.[/color][/SIZE][/font]

PostPosted: Fri Aug 12, 2011 9:52 am
by Hiryu
Those were clever, but the first two might actually require an explanation to those who aren't familiar with Japanese.


What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball?

A blonde is a human woman and a bowling ball is an inanimate object used for the popular sport of bowling.

PostPosted: Fri Aug 12, 2011 2:34 pm
by sailorsaturn
So duck walked into a bar and then was quickly shooed out for animals are not allowed in food establishments.

PostPosted: Fri Aug 12, 2011 2:56 pm
by Asuka Neko
A friend of mine tried to tell this joke while sitting in between me and my brother. We are both blondes. Kiiind of not the best place to tell a blonde joke...

But I'll tell it anyways.

A blonde is ordering pizza and the pizza guy asks if she'd like the pizza cut into 8 or 16 slices. She replies, "8, please. I couldn't eat 16!"

PostPosted: Sat Aug 13, 2011 11:50 pm
by CrystalChalice
Got this from a text message from my friend:

Girl: I'm having heart surgery today.
Boy: I know.
Girl: I love you!
Boy: I love you more, more than anything in this world.

After the surgery, the girl woke up, only to find her father near her bedside.

Girl: Where is he?
Father: You don't know who gave you the heart?
Girl: What?! *starts crying*
Father: Nah, just kidding! He's in the bathroom.

PostPosted: Sun Aug 14, 2011 8:30 pm
by Furen
What do you call a guy sitting on a pottery wheel?

[SPOILER]Clay[/SPOILER]

PostPosted: Mon Aug 15, 2011 8:30 am
by Diamond Dragon
KhakiBlueSocks (post: 1496859) wrote:
What do Edward Elric and a bowl of New Orleans Gumbo have in common? Shrimp.


OMGOSH HILARIOUS!!!!! XD

PostPosted: Mon Aug 15, 2011 11:59 am
by Furen
Diamond Dragon (post: 1497521) wrote:OMGOSH HILARIOUS!!!!! XD


Ed doesn't think so...

PostPosted: Mon Aug 15, 2011 12:30 pm
by Diamond Dragon
Yeah, that's true....in fact, I'll bet he's coming to kill both me and Khaki as we speak. O_O

PostPosted: Mon Aug 15, 2011 12:51 pm
by Furen
Diamond Dragon (post: 1497559) wrote:Yeah, that's true....in fact, I'll bet he's coming to kill both me and Khaki as we speak. O_O


I think that's a joke, you two have longer legs, he won't catch you :P

PostPosted: Mon Aug 15, 2011 2:09 pm
by Wallachia
Who's on First is highly applicable to this thread, so long as videos of jokes can count.

PostPosted: Mon Aug 15, 2011 2:18 pm
by Furen
What's on first? I really don't know... and why are they talking about tomorrow... I gotta figure this out today... naturally!

PostPosted: Mon Aug 15, 2011 2:54 pm
by Wallachia
Because those are the names of whom they're talking about.
Costello asks, "Who's on first?" and Abbot replies with, "Who is on first." because, "Who" is the name of the man on first.
It just escalates from there since Costello obviously doesn't catch on to someone having a wacky name like that.