Rudeness vs Respect: Guidelines for a Christian Community

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Rudeness vs Respect: Guidelines for a Christian Community

Postby Mithrandir » Sun Mar 21, 2010 10:33 pm

Hey everyone,

First off - you all pretty much rock across the board! I come back day after day and there's always a new laugh, a new insight, a new struggle, and a new triumph. I enjoy the time I get to spend sharing life with you guys! :thumb:

On a completely unrelated note, there has been a lot of discussion among the staff of the board - as well as PMs, chats, etc with many of you guys - regarding the overall level of civility on the board. Please remember that CAA is first and foremost a Christian Community; we expect our members to act in a courteous and respectful manner.

When you sign up for an account, you agree to follow the rules of the board. Among those rules are the following: "At CAA, we require all members, regardless of belief system to abide by our board rules and treat others with respect." We also explicitly forbid flaming in the rules (in the same sentence where we forbid trolling, to give you an idea of how strongly we feel about this.)

CAA strives to be a safe place for Christians who like anime. We recognize that we are not a church, but we are also not a sleazy bar. There are differing levels of courtesy and conversation that should be appropriate for different places. If you are hanging out with your friends behind the gym at school, you will likely use different language and treat each other differently than you would, say, the school principal or the pastor at your church.

In the VAST majority of instances, you guys have shown yourselves to be mature, well-meaning members of the community. Our goal of being a safe place for people to come and discuss anime (and arguably the rest of our lives, too) is only achievable because you guys genuinely wish to keep things friendly and polite; for the most part, we've been content to simply expect this behavior would continue. Lately, however, there has been some escalation that many feel does not adequately reflect the loving behavior of a group of Christ followers. If you want to act like a jerk when you're with your friends, that's fine; but we expect you to behave while you're here.

As a quick reminder, CAA does not allow discussions of Theology, Politics, and a few anime titles. We are frequently asked why theology discussion is not permitted on a Christian board as well as why certain anime are "off limits." You may be familiar with the DND list. ( http://www.christiananime.net/showthread.php?t=4946 ) For the users who have been here for a while, you're probably aware of WHY this is the case. After all, you've seen the evolution of the board with your own eyes. For the newer members, please allow me to explain. These are topics and titles that have caused bitter discussion that was not appropriate for this board. Good members caught up in bitter disagreement were flaming other members.

At first, we closed down these threads and told people to behave themselves. Eventually, the same topic would come up again, with similar results. The infighting was not appropriate behavior for a Christian community. The Do Not Discuss list was created, and we placed titles there which we observed always devolved into fights. The discussion of theology and politics were also eliminated from the board for similar reasons. Our rationale was this: We'd rather ban a topic than a member.

This thread is a continuation of that rationale. When you post on the board, we expect you will treat other members with respect. We expect you will be polite and courteous. We expect you will follow the rules of the board, and interact with each other as loving members of the Body of Christ. We recognize that not everyone here is a Christian, but we *do* expect you to respect our rules and our beliefs, and to treat each other with kindness, compassion, and courtesy.

As always, posts the staff deem to be flames (please see the FAQ/Rules section at the top of the page for a definition of "flaming") will be removed and, if appropriate, strikes may be awarded. We will also continue to post the occasional "be nice: play well with others" types of messages that have shown up from time to time. As a follow up, if we feel your post is over-the-top rude, we may mod-snip and link offending posts back to this thread. Note that it is our intention that this will not happen except in rare circumstances. We are not intending to outlaw humor or sarcasm or teasing between friends. We *are*, however, intending to hold everyone accountable for how they treat each other.

We also request you hold the staff to this same standard. If you ever feel like someone on staff is being rude to you, please PM us and let us know.

Thanks for reading... This was not an easy thread for me to make, so please bear with me if it didn't come across the way it was intended. The purpose of this thread is raising awareness of (and keeping you in the loop regarding) this growing concern among the membership in general and the staff as well. Thanks again, and God Bless!

- Mithrandir and the CAA Staff
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Postby Cognitive Gear » Sun Mar 21, 2010 10:50 pm

Thanks for addressing this in an official manner! It seems like this is a reoccurring problem here, and I think that this will help us all keep the community at it's best.
[font="Tahoma"][SIZE="2"]"It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things."

-Terry Pratchett[/SIZE][/font]
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Postby Mr. SmartyPants » Sun Mar 21, 2010 11:05 pm

This thread sux.

Lol jk. Mith. This thread is rather professional and well-mannered. Props, IT Man.
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Postby K. Ayato » Mon Mar 22, 2010 8:38 am

Kudos to you, Mith-sama! :jump: Please sticky this.
K. Ayato: What happens if you press the small red button?

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Postby Midori » Mon Mar 22, 2010 9:58 am

I could say this was why I stopped hanging out here, but that would be totally false, because the reason was that I had too much work at the time. I'm still around from time to time, and I might have a larger presence in the future if I get around to it. This is one of the few places on the net where I can (politely) speak my mind and never get shot down in flames.

Anyway, based on my impressions, our site has actually been more civil recently than it was back when I was a regular. Either that or the mods have been faster in suppressing rudeness, but I like to assume good will. It is good to see this kind of thread once in a while in any circumstance. We hold the staff in high regard. Way to go!
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Postby Rusty Claymore » Mon Mar 22, 2010 10:09 am

Hmmm, well put! In my experience here(albeit short experience) most of my problems that could be taken for rudeness have been typed emotion mis-translation. Either I didn't get the joke or felt condescended to. With the exception of one. But my wires were too criss-crossed to get what was going on then so I left the chatroom. >.<
Proverbs 31:32 "...when she watches anime, she keeps the room well lit and sits at a safe distance."
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Postby acgifford » Mon Mar 22, 2010 10:42 am

Thanks Mith! We will do that.^^
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Postby Straylight » Mon Mar 22, 2010 12:01 pm

Nice post.. although

strikes may be awarded


I did chuckle when I read that. ;)
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Postby Fantasy Dreamer » Mon Mar 22, 2010 12:54 pm

A good reminder for us all. Thanks, Mith. :thumbsup:
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Postby Mr. Hat'n'Clogs » Mon Mar 22, 2010 3:19 pm

:thumb: Well-written, as to be expected from our admin. Good job!
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Postby Mithrandir » Mon Mar 22, 2010 5:25 pm

[quote="Straylight (post: 1383003)"]Nice post.. although



I did chuckle when I read that. ]

TADA! Congratulations!!! :lol:
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Postby Midori » Mon Jan 10, 2011 2:36 pm

I am bumping this thread again because I think more attention needs to be paid to it.

However, I would also like to make one clarification:

It is rarely a good idea to call other people out for being disrespectful. Usually it is much better to report things to the moderators. If you do think you can handle it, be extra-careful to be obviously respectful yourself, and not to assume the other person wasn't just acting without thinking.

After all, what good does respect do if nobody sees it?
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Postby Masquerade1412 » Mon Jan 10, 2011 6:09 pm

Midori (post: 1450413) wrote:After all, what good does respect do if nobody sees it?

So true. It's hard to bow to every new member when they can't see you! :lol:
Joking aside, I do agree that we need to remain respectful to all.
Treat other as YOU would like to be treated!
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Postby Kunoichi » Tue Jan 11, 2011 1:27 am

Well written Mith and thank you for posting (even though I didn't see it back in March >.>).

On a joking note, I saw DND and had to wonder why Dungeons and Dragons was there, then read it again. lol
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