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I need help

PostPosted: Tue May 18, 2010 10:34 pm
by RefractedAhav
I know that God has been doing good things in my life and I have a good idea of where i should be going, relatively speaking. However, I am still fighting a combination of apathy and depression. I need more than motivation, I need some thing that will help me truly value my life and not just continue existing for the sake of others or because I know that ending it would be wrong. I finally got a job, which is a good thing but emotionally it is taking more out of me than building me up. I've been having to fight mis communications and technological problems the whole time along with my lack of confidence and inexperience with sales. Also I got a voice acting gig on one the projects here on CAA which is uplifting, but with the lack of socializing and the problems with work I really need more.

If you could pray for me I'd really apreciate it. Some things that would help would be an active bible study group, more friends, a car, a paid acting or other creative gig.

PostPosted: Wed May 19, 2010 10:41 am
by bkilbour
Hm.... PM me when you get the chance, man - I think I might be able to help, if yer willin'.
I will also keep praying for you, too.

PostPosted: Wed May 19, 2010 11:08 am
by Alcuinus
I'll pray for you man. I too have been at the point where things seem so pointless, but focusing on the sovereignty of God has greatly encouraged me. What I mean is this: First of all, the whole purpose of life, of all of history is to bring glory to God (1 Cor. 10:31, Col. 3:17, and 1 Pet. 4:11). God will be magnified in the end by this great, massive grand scheme, which He has crafted from eternity. That means that even in our simple acts of eating and praying, we bring Him glory. My simple life is a sacrifice unto God, whether I do some great deed or simply follow Him in my simple daily life, that He may be even in some small way be glorified. We live for God in everything, and I am floored that he has had shed grace upon grace on me who showed nothing short of hatred for Him. don't get me wrong; I was no raging heathen. I have no remarkable story where I was a great and terrible sinner. I was a "good kid" as far as anyone other than God and me could see, but the point is that even in this my most boring of all lives that anyone could have, God is glorified! There is no greater joy than to know that God was (in spite of me) actually pleased to save me! That, my friend and brother, is the whole point of living. Even in this, my boring day of this, my boring (and jobless :P) life, God will be glorified!

May God encourage you through His Word and give you the strength to continue looking heavenward for the true object of our affection. God bless, brother.

(wow that ended up being a lot longer than intended :P)

PostPosted: Wed May 19, 2010 5:35 pm
by RefractedAhav
thank you. I appreciate your prayers.

Alcuinus, I am trying to refocus my thoughts as I tend to be pessimistic. Also I have trouble sometimes discerning between God's voice and the voice of the enemy at times. However, I do see breaks in the clouds every now and then it's just that the clouds seem to have grown darker as of late. I hope that wasn't to cryptic.

Bkilbour, will do.

PostPosted: Wed May 19, 2010 6:02 pm
by Dr.Faust
Praying Man

PostPosted: Wed May 19, 2010 9:03 pm
by TGJesusfreak
Will be praying ^^

PostPosted: Wed May 19, 2010 10:16 pm
by Tsukuyomi
Hang in there, Elowen ^__^ I'll be praying ^__^

PostPosted: Fri May 28, 2010 7:40 pm
by RefractedAhav
Thank you all for your support. I am feeling better now. If any of you need help let me know and I will pray as well as see if there is anything else I can do.

PostPosted: Fri May 28, 2010 8:30 pm
by Makachop^^128
Will be praying, keep hope!

PostPosted: Fri May 28, 2010 9:01 pm
by J.R.
You're in my prayers. I struggle with depression as well. I know it can get really frustrating at times. Getting more involved in ministry at my church has helped me a lot. Maybe it can for you as well. When we dwell on our circumstances, negative feelings can perpetuate. The power of spreading compassion to others can be a significant one, for both them and yourself. I hope things start to improve for you.

PostPosted: Sun May 30, 2010 5:35 pm
by Angel37
In my prayers. :)

PostPosted: Fri Jun 11, 2010 8:36 pm
by RefractedAhav
Thank you all for your prayers. There is one more thing I'd like to add. I need help opening up to people. Close relationships are incredable uncomfortable for me unless I have know the person for a long time. Possible romantic relationships actually terrify me. When I feel some one coming that close I often feel threatend. This is why I often began to push friends away or avoid them when they start getting that close.

I want to be able to have healthy balanced relationship with people and one day even fall in love and let my self be loved in return, but right now that seems impossible. Please pray for healing