Demonic Attack
PostPosted: Mon Apr 05, 2010 10:12 pm
(Copied from my LiveJournal)
Today was terrible. The last few days have been mostly great. I've been coming to a much better place in my relationship with God, and have managed to overcome major hurdles in my life. However; because Satan can't allow a such victory to progress on to a more positive end result without a fight, he decided to try to drag me down again today. The first thing I noticed that was really off was while yesterday, despite a hellish day at work, I had a perfect peace inside of me, and was really feeling that I was coming to a new understanding of myself and God. Today was the opposite, I came into work and was overcome with a sudden hateful and depressed dark mood. I started finding myself asking myself a whole lot of strange questions about God, myself, and His plans for my life, and whether or not anything I believed was actually true; a whole lot of very twisted stuff.
Now my best friend and coworker Mike has a bit of an unusual gift to being a bit more sensitive to the spiritual realm then the average person, and when I was telling him about these things he admitted that he was sensing signs of more than one entity in the area. All of sudden, the "voices" in my head that were asking all these things that I thought were my own took a dark twist. I felt a sudden pang of hatred well up in me and the thought flashed through my head; "We really hate _____ and ____ _______. We want to kill them." From that point all the thoughts in my head started turning increasingly twisted and demonic. I tried speaking to them with my thoughts and was very disturbed that they started responding back. They started attacking my weaknesses and playing to my fears, trying to get me to doubt certain things about myself and my relationship with God. They threatened to kill people. When I tried to tell them that they have no power to do these things without God's permission, they started taking cheap shots and responding with stuff like; "But we took your mother."
So I had to work on a crazy, busy day with this war going on inside my head until I was certain that I had finally gone off the deep end and was going completely insane. But thankfully, by God's grace, they didn't stay the whole night and they eventually went away, and I felt myself completely snap back to the "normal" version of myself like I was yesterday.
Anyways, I feel like this is a very important time in my life as I've been doing a lot of repairing with my relationship with God and I really feel like He is on the verge of doing something incredible, and Satan isn't having any of it. I'm not sure exactly what his plan is, but I need prayer to make sure I stay on the right path and don't get deluded into going off of it, because even though those voices were not my own, they have had obviously thousands of years of practice and they knew how to say things contrary to God's word and make it sound like it made sense.
I am also incredibly disturbed by who they said they'd like to kill. They didn't mention my family or friends or anyone actually close to me. However...
Today was terrible. The last few days have been mostly great. I've been coming to a much better place in my relationship with God, and have managed to overcome major hurdles in my life. However; because Satan can't allow a such victory to progress on to a more positive end result without a fight, he decided to try to drag me down again today. The first thing I noticed that was really off was while yesterday, despite a hellish day at work, I had a perfect peace inside of me, and was really feeling that I was coming to a new understanding of myself and God. Today was the opposite, I came into work and was overcome with a sudden hateful and depressed dark mood. I started finding myself asking myself a whole lot of strange questions about God, myself, and His plans for my life, and whether or not anything I believed was actually true; a whole lot of very twisted stuff.
Now my best friend and coworker Mike has a bit of an unusual gift to being a bit more sensitive to the spiritual realm then the average person, and when I was telling him about these things he admitted that he was sensing signs of more than one entity in the area. All of sudden, the "voices" in my head that were asking all these things that I thought were my own took a dark twist. I felt a sudden pang of hatred well up in me and the thought flashed through my head; "We really hate _____ and ____ _______. We want to kill them." From that point all the thoughts in my head started turning increasingly twisted and demonic. I tried speaking to them with my thoughts and was very disturbed that they started responding back. They started attacking my weaknesses and playing to my fears, trying to get me to doubt certain things about myself and my relationship with God. They threatened to kill people. When I tried to tell them that they have no power to do these things without God's permission, they started taking cheap shots and responding with stuff like; "But we took your mother."
So I had to work on a crazy, busy day with this war going on inside my head until I was certain that I had finally gone off the deep end and was going completely insane. But thankfully, by God's grace, they didn't stay the whole night and they eventually went away, and I felt myself completely snap back to the "normal" version of myself like I was yesterday.
Anyways, I feel like this is a very important time in my life as I've been doing a lot of repairing with my relationship with God and I really feel like He is on the verge of doing something incredible, and Satan isn't having any of it. I'm not sure exactly what his plan is, but I need prayer to make sure I stay on the right path and don't get deluded into going off of it, because even though those voices were not my own, they have had obviously thousands of years of practice and they knew how to say things contrary to God's word and make it sound like it made sense.
I am also incredibly disturbed by who they said they'd like to kill. They didn't mention my family or friends or anyone actually close to me. However...