Feel stupid for asking...
PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 12:34 am
I feel stupid for asking since I've had to ask for help quite a bit lately, but I really have no choice...
These past few days I feel so sick and hateful toward life. I've been having severe doubts over my faith and I hate it. I want it to get better and go back to normal, I miss my relationship with God and Jesus, the comfort and happiness I had and the assurance I had of my faith. I know all Christians have moments like these, but it's like I can't get over it and it won't get better...
I'm not having any doubts in the sense that God doesn't exist (I know there's a God, so that's not an issue), I also don't believe in islam, hinduism, etc. so that's not an issue either. By simple process of elimination you'd like "well if Christianity's left, shouldn't that just answer all your questions?" but it's like for whatever reason it's not. It's like I almost have a doubt that "what if there's a chance the God who created everything never actually has shown Himself to the world...?" It's almost like the devil's giving me these last doubts since if I can overcome them, there's really nothing else in the world that would make me doubt Him in the slightest, like I said, the rest of the stuff doesn't phase me, so I just...I gotta get over this.
I try and remind myself that secular sources of Jesus's day admit He performed all these miracles (even the Jews didn't deny what He was doing, although they hated it and tried to contribute it to satan), you also have so many specific prophecies about Jesus that came true, the 500 or so seeing Him after rising again, Paul's dramatic change that couldn't have been anything OTHER than a supernatural experience, and so on. There are also the later prophecies that nobody could've really predicted at all (doesn't revelation talk about how everyone will watch very secluded events occur? Nowadays we know how that could happen, but how the heck could have somebody back then imagined that?), and yet...I just keep having these irritating doubts and I just feel so sick.
I miss the way things use to be. If I could have one wish, it would be to have my faith and love for God to be stronger than anything else. I've given God a lot lately as almost an attempt to show Him I'm willing to give whatever for Him to make it better, but...*shrugs* I just really wish I could have some prayers...thanks...
These past few days I feel so sick and hateful toward life. I've been having severe doubts over my faith and I hate it. I want it to get better and go back to normal, I miss my relationship with God and Jesus, the comfort and happiness I had and the assurance I had of my faith. I know all Christians have moments like these, but it's like I can't get over it and it won't get better...
I'm not having any doubts in the sense that God doesn't exist (I know there's a God, so that's not an issue), I also don't believe in islam, hinduism, etc. so that's not an issue either. By simple process of elimination you'd like "well if Christianity's left, shouldn't that just answer all your questions?" but it's like for whatever reason it's not. It's like I almost have a doubt that "what if there's a chance the God who created everything never actually has shown Himself to the world...?" It's almost like the devil's giving me these last doubts since if I can overcome them, there's really nothing else in the world that would make me doubt Him in the slightest, like I said, the rest of the stuff doesn't phase me, so I just...I gotta get over this.
I try and remind myself that secular sources of Jesus's day admit He performed all these miracles (even the Jews didn't deny what He was doing, although they hated it and tried to contribute it to satan), you also have so many specific prophecies about Jesus that came true, the 500 or so seeing Him after rising again, Paul's dramatic change that couldn't have been anything OTHER than a supernatural experience, and so on. There are also the later prophecies that nobody could've really predicted at all (doesn't revelation talk about how everyone will watch very secluded events occur? Nowadays we know how that could happen, but how the heck could have somebody back then imagined that?), and yet...I just keep having these irritating doubts and I just feel so sick.
I miss the way things use to be. If I could have one wish, it would be to have my faith and love for God to be stronger than anything else. I've given God a lot lately as almost an attempt to show Him I'm willing to give whatever for Him to make it better, but...*shrugs* I just really wish I could have some prayers...thanks...
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